Unbreakable bonds
by Athese
Summary: 'She recognized him immediately, the plastron, the shell, the freckles that dotted his face. She took another step, looking closer towards the creature. Dirt was covering his green skin, scrapes and bruises decorating his skin. Chains around both his wrist and ankles, connected to the wall. And the worst of all, the muzzle on his face. The baby blue eyes filled with so much fear.'
1. Chapter 1

**I got this idea a few weeks ago after watching an episode of Criminal Minds. I think it was season 7 or so, and the episode was called 'foundation'. **

**This takes place after the season 1 finale, somewhere before 'The Wrath of Tiger Claw' **

April sighed, supporting her head on top of her hand, blankly staring outside of the window. Rain was hitting the window with such force she was sure it would break any time soon. Occasionally the sky would light up, and a loud thunder would echo through the air.

The red-haired teen sighed again and looked towards her mobile, still turned on and focused on her messages. Casey still wasn't answering, she had sent the message 30 minutes ago, and still no reply came from the teen.

"Fine" She huffed, standing up angrily and picking up her jacket, folding it around her body to keep herself warm. She turned off her phone and placed it in her pocket, walking outside the room and through the halls of the lab.

She loved her job, even though it was obligated from the school to take a job, she still loved it. She always loved animals, so working with them was something she really liked. But at times like these, she hated it.

She hated having to walk through the rain, and just when she needed him, she couldn't reach Casey. He had promised her she could call him whenever she needed a ride, and when she actually needed one, she couldn't reach him.

She knew she was being ridiculous, Casey didn't need to pick her up or something, but he still promised her he would pick her up, and right now he wasn't even answering. And that was something that pissed her off the most.

She turned off the light in the halls as she passed by, checking if every door on the side was closed and locked. Rain was still hitting the wall and windows, and she couldn't contain the shiver that went down her spine.

She never liked being the last one to leave the building. She didn't bother locking the place down but it was always so creepy, and that wasn't because of all the caged animals around her.

Many people thought it was a lab, and practically it was, but where she worked it wasn't. It was merely a research center, where they trained various animals. They compared the behavior of normal pets and normally 'wild' animals.

Testing how much could be learned to those animals. And of course there was a lab, where animals where tested but luckily she didn't have to work there. And her boss had assured her they weren't hurting the animals with the chemicals or anything. Not that she believed him on that part.

April folded her jacket around her a little bit tighter as she was almost done, and only 2 doors remained. A shudder went down her spine and she viciously turned around. But there was nothing, only the darkness, and the only light coming from the windows.

The red-haired teen frowned slightly, she was sure she heard something but there was nothing. She let out a short breath and turned around again, ready to walk towards the door to lock it when something was placed on her shoulder.

She let out an icy scream which was cut off by a hand being placed on her mouth. Her eyes went wide and she reached for the attacker, elbowing him in his stomach. A painful grunt came from the boy and she turned around, facing him.

"Casey?!" She practically yelled as she saw the teen standing there, rubbing his stomach slightly. Her heart was still beating viciously and she was trembling slightly from the shock. Casey looked towards April, smirking slightly.

"Hey Red" He chuckled, flashing a grin. April huffed, crossing her arms over her chest and narrowing her eyes. She could feel her heart beating beneath her as she kept glaring at the vigilante in front of her, totally packed with his hockey sticks and even his mask.

"Don't scare me like that! " April called out, taking a deep breath to calm herself down and turning around again, ready to walk away when the same hand on her shoulder stopped her.

"Wait up Red!" He called out and turned her around against her will. "It wasn't that scary right? I just wanted to surprise ya" He said. April sighed and took Casey's hand and dropped it with a loud sigh. She had no right to be angry really.

"Let's just get out of here" April said after a while, turning around and walking towards the door at the end of the hall. It was the door that led to lab part of the facility. Somewhere she wasn't even allowed to go to.

"What's in there?" Casey asked, pointing towards the door where April was standing. The red-haired teen sighed slightly and pointed to the obvious sign that hung on the door, clearly 'Lab' written on it. Casey chuckled as he took a step towards the door.

"Wicked…." Casey mumbled and reached for the door, ready to open it already when April slapped his hand away. "What?! I wanna look?" Casey yelled, whining slightly and looking over to April.

"Forget it Jones, I'm not even allowed to go in there" She explained, slightly guilty from hitting Casey that hard. "Besides I just want to get out of here, this place is creeping me out at night" A smirk crept on Casey's face as he once again reached for the door, but this time opened it.

"No way red" He grinned, opening it further to peek inside. "Besides, I'm the one driving so I decide when we leave" He added with a smirk and fully walked inside, reaching for the light and turning it on. April sighed and walked into the room too.

"And I'm really starting to doubt if I should let you drive" April said, scanning the room too. Despite her fear of being caught, it was pretty amazing. "Where are the turtles anyways, I couldn't reach them either?" April whispered as she read the various signs on the doors.

"You don't know?" Casey frowned, raising a single eyebrow. April looked towards Casey and shook her head, indicating she didn't know. "They went to the park….." Casey said and immediately April's face fell as realization hit her.

"You mean, it has already been a whole year?" She whispered. A few tears appeared in her eyes as Casey slowly nodded. They didn't need words to know what Casey meant. It had already been a whole year since Mikey had died.

The last time they'd seen him, or found something that belonged to him was at the park in New York, so it was to be expected they would go to the park to honor his death, as much that could be honored. Her turtle friends had taken the death of Mikey hard, and they weren't the same ever since.

They were living their lives again, but the death of their baby brother was still fresh in their mind, and they never really overcame that loss. It took them a few weeks to even function normally again, and after that, life just went on.

Casey never got to know her youngest turtle friend. He died before Raph met him, just 2 weeks after the Kraang invasion. Casey came into their lives like a month after, and was one of the reasons why Raph was acting normal these days.

Of course, even after a month Raph was still mourning over the death of his baby brother, but it was less. And just as they thought he was going to be okay, his pet turtle Spike was mutated and betrayed him.

His brothers and him barely survived Spike's attack, but afterwards Raph was getting worse again. He always talked to Spike. And now he wasn't there anymore, and even betrayed him, and that hurt him a lot. And if it wasn't for Casey, he would probably still be sulking.

"Wait Casey!" April suddenly yelled, running towards Casey as he was trying to open a door. "I'm not allowed to go in there, my boss strictly forbid me" She said with a serious tone, Casey looked confused for a second but then chuckled.

"And do you even know what is in this room?" He asked, raising an eyebrow and smirking slightly.

"They said something about their most precious experiment" She informed him. "But he also told me that if I would ever look I'd lose my job. Let's just go" She said, tugging Casey's arm to get him to move, but Casey didn't move, instead he just grabbed the door handle again.

"Most precious experiment, and you never checked?" Casey smirked as he slowly opened the door. "Ladies first" He said, gesturing for April to go inside. April sighed, she knew there was no arguing with him, and to be honest, she was really curious after all.

The door wasn't locked, but it was only able to open it from the outside, so whatever animal was in the cage, couldn't escape. And you could only open it from the inside with a special key, which they obviously didn't have.

April slowly stepped into the room. It was completely dark so the only light came from the hall. She quickly glanced back and saw Casey blocking the door with his hockey stick, so it wouldn't close and enough light fell into the room.

There was a dark figure in the corner of the room, far away from the door. The chains were clearly visible and somehow April felt her stomach twisting. Nobody deserved to be locked away like that.

Slowly she took another step and froze. More light shined into the room, showing the green skin of the creature. Her breath hitched in her throat and she slowly shook her head. She recognized him immediately, the plastron, the shell.

The freckles that dotted his face. She took another step, looking closer towards the creature. Dirt was covering his green skin, scrapes and bruises decorating his skin. Chains around both his wrist and ankles, connected to the wall. And the worst of all, the muzzle on his face.

Another hesitant step was made and his body tensed, never looking up but April could see the clear trembling. She took another step and slowly the creature looked up. The baby blue eyes filled with so much fear April could feel her stomach turn again. She couldn't believe what she was seeing.

"…M-Mikey…?"


	2. Chapter 2

_She took another step and slowly the creature looked up. The baby blue eyes filled with so much fear April could feel her stomach turn again. She couldn't believe what she was seeing. _

_"…M-Mikey…?" _

Her voice trembled as she said those words, tears already threatening to spill. It was real, from the moment she saw him she knew it was real. She had no idea how, how he was still alive, but she knew he wasn't her imagination.

Slowly April took another step towards the scared mutant, and immediately a loud and animalistic hiss escaped Mikey's mouth, muffled by the muzzle around his face and he scrambled backwards. Pressing his shell against the far corner as hard as he could.

"Red?" Casey whispered hesitantly, not sure what he was seeing. He never met the young turtle so it was obvious he wouldn't recognize him, but he saw a mutant turtle in the giant cage, just like Raph, Leo and Donnie.

"It's him Casey" April whispered, not taking her eyes off Mikey. He was huddled in the corner of the room, hugging his own chains and staring wide-eyed at April, tears brimming in his eyes. They almost seemed to glow in contrast with his dirty skin.

"Stay here" April whispered, quickly glancing to Casey, gesturing him to stay back. Mikey didn't know him, never met him, and he was obviously petrified by them, even April. The red haired teen took another step, and with no way out, Mikey hissed again.

Again a low animalistic hiss, normal turtles would let out once they were threatened, escaped Mikey's mouth. And it hurt April to see Mikey like this, so animalistic. She was so happy to see Mikey alive, in a way, but it hurt her to see him with all the scrapes, the chains, the muzzle, and the hurtful eyes.

"It's okay Mikey. It's me, April" April lowly whispered, slowly extending her hand towards Mikey. The mutant began to shake even more, clearly scared. His shell was tightly pressed against the iron wall, and his eyes filled with tears already.

"You don't have to be afraid Mikey, no one is going to hurt you okay?" She continued, taking another slow step. The trembling never stopped but Mikey stopped trying to get away, staring at the approaching teen fearfully.

April expected him to do something, hiss again, cry, and in the worst case attack her, but he seemed to be frozen as April slowly extended her hand. She was so close, after a whole year she was just inches away from her little brother.

"Don't be scared" She whispered as she carefully, very carefully pressed her fingertips against Mikey's giant hand. His blue eyes immediately disconnected from hers and he looked downwards, staring wide-eyed at the human hand.

Slowly he tilted his own hand, taking April's hand in between his own hand, softly squeezing it. It didn't hurt, far from it, she barely felt any pressure, and Mikey was obviously not intending on hurting her, which was a good sign.

Her breathing was soft and calm while her heart was beating, but she remained silent as Mikey slowly squeezed her tiny hand. The tremors in his body increased every second but no more fear was shown, and when the tears began to fell she knew why he was trembling.

He slowly looked up, looking directly into April's eyes as he carefully placed his free hand on top of April's hand, so her hand was between Mikey's hands. There was fear in his eyes, and deep within she could see all the horrors that he had faced, but there was also recognition.

"It's okay Mikey, nobody is going to hurt you" She whispered, slowly reaching out for Mikey's face. And even though Mikey was clearly beyond terrified, he allowed April to touch his cheek. Very slowly not to startle him.

"You are safe Mikey" April whispered, slowly stroking Mikey's cheek with her thumb, like she would always do if Mikey would get upset. A weak nod came from Mikey and he slowly leaned forwards, and it wasn't until his head hit her chest, she understood what he was doing.

"It will be alight Mikey, I promise" She whispered as she wrapped her arm around Mikey's shell, carefully drawing him closer but not forcing him because she knew that would be the last thing she would want to do, if she didn't want to freak him out again.

Mikey was shaking in April's arm and Casey was silently watching as the youngest brother of his mutant family cried his heart out.

**TMNT**

Mikey was still crying in her hold, and honestly she didn't want to disturb him but she knew it would be better if they would get Mikey out of here as soon as possible. Get rid of the chains, the muzzle, clean him and feed him, but most importantly call his brothers.

"Mikey" She whispered, slowly tipping up his chin. The young mutant whimpered slightly and it was clear he was debating whether to pull away or not from the touch but chose the latter. "We are going to get you out of here, do you think you can walk?"

Her voice was quiet and full with hurt as she looked over his body. He didn't seemed to have any obvious injuries. Some bandages were wrapped around his underarm and legs, but apart from that there were no serious injuries.

But Mikey nodded nevertheless. For a second April turned around, gesturing for Casey to step forwards before turning towards Mikey again. And even when Casey did a few steps, even though they were slow, Mikey was clearly freaking out again.

"It's okay Mikey, he's my friend, and Raph" Upon mentioning his brother's name Mikey's head shot up again, watching over to April. Casey continued to move, but even he was smart enough not to touch Mikey right away. Casey lowered himself, not to freak him out and glanced towards Mikey.

"I'm Casey" He offered. Mikey didn't know where to look and was obviously becoming very nervous but after a few seconds nodded tiredly, indicating it was okay, and Casey was allowed to help him. Casey looked over to April before they both carefully hovered him up by his arms, not making any sudden movement.

The chains were still around his limps, and so was his muzzle but that was something they couldn't do something about right now, and they had to look after that once they were home. Mikey's legs were bugling beneath him, obviously out of shape but he carried on nevertheless.

"Is your car close by?" April whispered over to Casey as they left the lab. Mikey was struggling to keep up with them but made no sound at all, no whimper, no cry, nothing.

"Just outside, nobody will see" Casey answered before glancing down to the small turtle. It was all true what April had told him about Mikey, he was smaller than the rest. The brilliant blue eyes, the freckles on his face and the child like appearance. Even if his eyes held a different story.

Casey opened the front door with his free hand and they walked outside. A huge shiver wracked through Mikey's body but they continued walking, and just like Casey said his van was parked just a few meters away from the entrance.

It was some kind of courtyard, only there was one road that you could drive on to get to the main road, and luckily that was on the other side of the building, so no one could see the two teens carrying along Mikey.

Casey's van was almost similar to April's father's party wagon, only cheaper, and black and green colors instead of all the colors on Kirby's van. Casey opened the backdoor and helped April to get Mikey into the van.

"I'll lock up for you" Casey offered with a small grin, looking over to the distressed turtle. April mouthed a silent thank you as she gave him the keys. Casey closed the door behind him and April and Mikey were alone in the van.

"Here, you must be freezing" April whispered and took off her jacket, folding it around Mikey body. The freckled turtle merely shrugged and drew his knees up to his chest, folding his arms around them, almost impossible because of the chains around them.

April sighed slightly and carefully wrapped her arm around him, first testing if he was okay with it, but it was like Mikey's mind was completely numb, not even noticing everything around him. She reached for her pocket with the other hand, taking out her phone.

She quickly dialed Leo's number and placed the phone against her ear, waiting for him to pick up. She knew she had tried just an hour ago, but this time it was important, really important. She closed her eyes when she got his voicemail and directly dialed Donnie's number.

But as expected Donnie wasn't answering too. "Donnie, call me back whenever you hear this. It's important" She finished her call and hang up. The next number was something she had never called before and was only for emergencies only, but figuring this was one she called anyways.

She placed the phone onto her ear again and waited again. She grumbled slightly when not even Master Splinter answered her call, and placed her phone in her pocket again. They would call back when they would get home, right now they had to look after Mikey.

"Where do we go Red?" Casey quietly asked as he sat down behind the steering wheel. April's head shot up, not realizing Casey had even entered the car, and apparently Mikey had the same thing as he crept somewhat closer to April.

"My house" She whispered. "They aren't answering and my aunt is out of town for 3 more days anyways, besides, he'll be more comfortable" She added, gesturing to Mikey. Casey gave a short nod as he started the van and drove off. Taking Mikey with them.


	3. Chapter 3

**So this week my test week starts, and it won't end until Thursday next week, so I won't be updating (much) the following days, I'll try but I really need to get my grades up, and I've got a whole lot to learn :( **

**Wish me luck ^^ And thanks everyone for reviewing/following this story so far! **

**TMNT**

It wasn't a long drive towards her house but it seemed like it. Mikey was completely silent the whole way, not surprisingly with the muzzle still on his face, but he made no attempt to do anything, he was just deathly silent the whole time.

Staring blankly towards his knees. Nervously clawing his own fingers and shaking in fear. They needed to stay low the whole time, so nobody would see them carrying around a giant turtle. And once they reached her apartment they had to wrap him tightly in her jacket, but him getting seen was still a big risk.

Luckily, nobody was out on the streets and they carried him inside without any problems. The way towards the living room was just as slow as their way to April's home. Mikey's knees and legs were almost giving out, the sudden strain being too much but he refused to give in, and every time they offered to carry him, he let out the same hiss again.

"Casey, go to the kitchen and find something to cut these chains with" April ordered as they settled Mikey on couch. She slowly untangled the jacket from his body and gave him a blanket, but still there was no reaction from Mikey and April had to fold it around his body herself.

Casey nodded and walked off to the kitchen. April sighed and rested a comfortable hand on Mikey's knees. Immediately Mikey jerked backwards, letting out another animalistic hiss in fear, scrambling away.

"Easy Mikey, I would never hurt you" April coed, raising her hands in a sign of defeat. "Casey will get something to cut those chains and your muzzle, okay?" She asked but as expected, no response came from and looked away, closing his eyes in fear.

"I know you've been through a rough time Mikey, and you are probably scared" April started, slowly Mikey opened his eyes, glancing over to April. "I can't say I know what you are going through, but you have to know I am here for you" She continued, flashing a tiny smile.

But once again, no response came from him, not even the slightest one. She sighed slightly and grabbed her phone again, looking if someone had called her, but as expected there was none. Just when she needed them most, they weren't available.

"I think.. this will do the job" Casey said, walking inside of the room again, carrying a large scissor specially designed for cutting chains and thick wires. A low whimper escaped Mikey's throat as he laid eyes on the giant scissor and he started trembling again.

"Don't worry Mikey" April said, shuffling closer to Mikey as Casey walked over to Mikey. "Casey will cut the chains okay? He won't hurt you" Mikey seemed to doubt for a few moments but nodded his head faintly in the end, tears appearing in his eyes again.

Casey nodded towards April and she carefully grabbed the chain that was connecting his ankles and wrists together, and Casey easily cut through them. Mikey whimpered in fear and turned his head towards April.

"Just a little longer, you're doing great" She whispered and wrapped her arm around him. She carefully grabbed his wrists and presented them to Casey, who cut through those too. Red and angry marks revealing themselves. And in some places there was even fresh blood.

His wrists were covered with scars, all from struggling against his chains. The texture of the chain drilled into the skin, sweat, dirt and blood covering it. Scars and open wounds finishing it. April gasped at the sight, covering her mouth with her shaky hand.

"I'll get the first aid kit" She said and ran towards the kitchen. She couldn't believe it… that someone would do that to him. Chain him up, muzzle him and hurt him. There were scars all over his wrists, and who knows how long they had already been there.

Casey didn't say anything as he cut through the chains around his ankles, revealing the same markings that decorated his wrists, but now around his ankles. And they only indicated how tight they had been around Mikey.

And how much he had struggled to get loose, every day, and every night. Trying to break free from his captivity, from all the people who would do things to him, things Casey didn't even know, and probably didn't even want to know.

"Last one" Casey said as he took off all the chains and put them aside and standing up, moving towards the back of the couch to cut Mikey's muzzle. It was strapped to his face by chains, and it was obvious it had been there for a very long time, just like the chains.

The muzzle fell off immediately after Casey had cut through the chains. Mikey gasped slightly and opened his mouth slightly, and directly closing it. Casey expected a reaction, a thank you, a question, but nothing came out of his mouth.

"I can't believe it" April whispered as she hurried back to the couch, sitting down next to Mikey again with the first aid kit. "Those bastards! I can't believe they did this" She said as she opened the kit, revealing all the medical stuff.

She grabbed some water and used that to clean his wrists. Mikey's face was filled with pain as April cleaned his wrist but nothing came out of his mouth, he wasn't struggling or protesting, just allowed April to clean his wrists.

And not even when April began to disinfect the wound did he cry out, protest or pull away. And in a way, it broke April's heart. Mikey had never handled disinfect well, none of them did, and now being practically immune to it, only indicated how much worse he had endured.

None of them said something while April continued to clean his wrist, disinfecting them again and wrapping them up eventually, before going to his ankles while Casey helped whenever she needed someone to help her. And still Mikey made no sound at all.

"Talk to me Mikey, anything" April whispered as she was done with his ankles. She hated how quiet Mikey was, she understood he was scared, she understood he had been through a lot, but she couldn't understand why he wasn't saying something, anything.

Mikey didn't even look up, or responded in any way upon April's comment, and kept on staring like he had done the whole time April and Casey were treating him. April bit back a single tear that was threatening to spill and turned towards the bandages around Mikey's underarms.

She carefully touched them and started to unwrap the left one. A low hiss of pain escaped Mikey's mouth as April unfolded the bandages and immediately April felt a sting of guilt through her for hurting Mikey and she immediately wondered what was beneath it.

She gasped in horror as the arm was presented. It was terribly swollen and red. Needle marks all over his underarm, too many to count. She felt so bad for him right now, who knows what they had been injecting him with and for how long.

"Don't worry, no one will hurt you ever again" April whispered as she saw the fearful look in Mikey's eyes and reached for something to cool it down with. The tension left Mikey's body slightly as April carefully applied it over the swollen area, and April winced slightly as she felt the rough and warm skin.

After she was done she wrapped his arm in clean bandages again and turned towards his other arm. She had expected more needle marks, but there were none. Instead there was a long diagonal cut, sewed together by stitches.

"Oh Mikey" April whispered as she carefully placed her hands on top of the wound. The cut was perfectly diagonal, and the stitches were perfectly done and she knew directly what happened to him, they cut him open for research. And she could only hope he wasn't awake during it.

Scientists, or whoever did this, stitched it up nicely and there was nothing more April could do other than bandaging it again. The other two bandages, on either leg, carried the same long scar, with the same stitches sewing the skin together. And again, April couldn't do anything besides bandaging it.

"That's all I can do for now Mikey, do you need anything?" She whispered as she stood up. So many emotions flashed over Mikey's eyes but he kept completely silent. No word, no movement, no look. "I'll get you some water and food, you can eat it if you like" She offered, ready to walk to the kitchen when suddenly her phone rang.

She cursed inwards as she realized she had her sound still on, and her loud ringtone beamed through her house. Immediately Mikey shot up and stumbled towards the corner of the room, curling up inside a ball. Tears were immediately streaming down his face, his eyes wide with fear.

"Casey help him calm down" April said as she quickly pulled out her phone, seeing Donnie's picture on the screen. She groaned slightly, she should've turned her sound off, Mikey was scared out of his shell, he couldn't handle all the noise.

"April what's wrong?!" Donnie yelled on the other side of the line when April placed her phone to her ear. April winced slightly and turned around to look at Casey and Mikey. The teen was now slowly walking towards Mikey.

"I'm okay" April tried to assure him but obviously Donnie didn't buy it, and before she could even explain herself Donnie started yelling again.

"You called the cheese phone April, is someone following you again, the Kraang, Karai, Shredder…." Donnie stopped mid-sentence and there was a short silence before another voice cut in. "Sorry April, Donnie just freaked out, what's wrong?" Leo's voice sounded, obviously more calm than Donnie was.

"It's okay…I promise I won't hurt you, no one will" Casey said, trying to come close to Mikey but every time he tried Mikey let out another hiss, louder and more threatening now his muzzle was gone, and April couldn't contain a shiver, it scared her, even if she knew Mikey would never hurt anyone, the hiss scared her.

"April, whose with Casey?" Leo asked unsure. Another loud hiss came from Mikey, another failed attempt to reach him.

"Look Leo, something happened. Can you just come to my house now? It's important." She said, biting her lip slightly. She couldn't just tell them Mikey was here. They would freak out, or not believe her, besides what would they even think. On the other side she could hear Leo sighing.

"We are on our way, give us three minutes" Leo said and then he hang up. April had no time to reply before the line went dead. Immediately April threw her phone on the couch and turned towards Mikey, who was still shaking in the corner of the room.

"Mikey" April called out, a little louder than she had intended, but it caught Mikey's attention. "It's okay, it was just my phone, no one will hurt you" She said in a low tone and kneeled just a meter away from Mikey, as far as Mikey would let Casey go.

Another hiss turned into a chocked sob as tears continued to flow down his face, mixing with all the dirt on his face.

"Come here Mikey, you know I will never hurt you" She coed and stretched an arm towards him. "You can have some food and something to drink if you want" She added. A flash of uncertainty washed over his face when April mentioned the food and Mikey's mouth opened for a second, before closing it immediately.

He turned his head away in shame and that's when April slowly shuffled closer until she engulfed Mikey in a big hug. The freckled turtle allowed her to hug him and fully fell into April's hold, burying his face in April's chest.

**TMNT**

**His brothers are on their way! Next chapter will be with his brothers, I promise! But it will take a little longer due to my test week :( **


	4. Chapter 4

**Tomorrow I will really have to focus on my test week, but I didn't want to leave you all hanging.  
>Hope you enjoy ^^<strong>

**"I'm like a rubber band until you pull too hard, I may snap and I move fast" ~ **

**TMNT**

"I just don't get it Red" Casey sighed as he came into the kitchen again, carrying a glass of water and some crackers. Casey placed the plate of food on the table and handed April the glass of water. Mikey was back on the couch again, after April had calmed him down enough.

He was freaked out, completely freaked out. And only by her ringtone. And that only made her wonder more, what happened to him? What did they ever do to him? She knew her boss was lying when he told her no animal would get hurt, but Mikey was simply terrified. So whatever it was, it must've been bad.

"It's nothing personal Casey, he doesn't know you" April responded as she handed Mikey the glass of water, who accepted it with shaky hands. "He just met you, and he doesn't trust anyone" She explained. Mikey slowly lowered the glass and looked away again, April noticed.

"You don't have to drink if you're not thirsty, whatever they did to you, or forced you to do…" She stopped mid-sentence as Mikey began to shake again, fear building up in his chest again. April wanted to grab the water from Mikey again, thinking he didn't want it anymore but he hissed just as April went to grab it.

"Easy Mikey" April called out, slightly afraid by Mikey's threat. "No one will take it away from you if you don't want to okay? You can have as much as you want" Slowly Mikey's face softened, and the hateful eyes were replaced by his usual ones, full with fear.

A slow nod came from him as he brought the glass up to his mouth again, slowly taking a sip of the cold water. A short flash of relief washed over his face, and he hummed slightly in satisfaction as the cold water slipped down his throat

He nervously glanced from April to Casey before taking another sip, and within seconds the glass was empty. April smiled slightly when she saw the empty glass and looked over to Mikey himself.

"Do you want another one?" She whispered. More uncertainty flashed over Mikey's eyes, and he eventually shook his head slowly, but April could see he wanted more. "It's okay Mikey, Casey will get you some more" She said with a small smile and handed Casey the glass.

Mikey's head slowly lifted up and he looked over to April, his eyes locking into hers. She knew he was too afraid to ask, that his captors probably never allowed him to ask anything, or he simply couldn't do it. They had to be very careful with him.

He was scarred and afraid. Every noise could set him off, every touch or movement could freak him out again. April was about to speak again when she heard the familiar tick on her window again. She almost jumped up but managed to contain herself for Mikey.

"Stay here" She said and stood up. "Don't worry, your brothers are here, don't be afraid" She whispered as she noticed how Mikey grew tense again, feeling more persons around the house. She nudged his shoulder lightly before sprinting towards her room, and as expected they were already standing on the roof, in front of her window.

"Hey guys" She slowly said as she opened the window. Leo, Raph and Donnie all stepped into her room, shaking slightly from the cold, they were all dripping water from the rain outside. And despite the situation, she laughed and threw a towel towards each one of them.

"Hey" Leo said as he quickly dried himself before fixing his gaze on April. "So.. what happened?" Leo asked straight to the point, his voice low as a flash of worry was shown on his face, trying to determine what could have happened to April.

"Sit down first" April said and gestured to her bed. They were hesitant for a bit but eventually sat down. "I don't know exactly how to tell you this…. Well… you know I work in that lab here in New York right?" She asked, sitting down too and drawing a big breath.

"Yeah, and you know we hate that" Raph growled, which earned him a violent jab in his side by both Leo and Donnie. April nodded slightly, she knew they hated her work, even though they supported April, but they all knew what scientists would do to them once they would get captured.

"Well, today Casey picked me up but you know him and… we went to the part of the lab that I'm not allowed to go to and…" She stopped for a second, taking in another deep breath. "We found Mikey guys, he's alive" The moment she said it, everyone went quiet.

The three brothers were all exchanging glances, unsure about April's statement. They had moved on with their lives. Mikey was dead, and even though they were still mourning about him, they had move on, it couldn't be. He couldn't be alive.

"Alright, that's it" Raph growled and stood up, walking towards the window. April immediately jumped from her chair and ran towards the window too, blocking Raph's way so he couldn't pass through her window, they couldn't leave now.

"Raph listen to me, I'm not joking!" She screamed, pushing Raph in his plastron, but not hurting him. "I don't know how he's still alive but he is, and he's in my living room right now" She exclaimed, narrowing her eyes to show she was really meaning it.

"Is he really…?" Leo said with a shaky voice as he stood up, looking towards the living room, but was unable to see anything due to the angle. April sighed and took a step towards the guys and nodded. Tears brimming in her eyes.

"He is, but he's scared guys" A single tear rolled down her cheek. "He's scared of loud noises, voices, touches, anything. I don't know what they did to him guys but I'm not sure if I wanna know" She finished. Tears were threatening to fall but she held them back.

"Calm down April" Leo soothed as he wrapped his arms around April. "We will fix this okay? Everything will be alright" April sobbed slightly. That was the same thing Leo told her when she heard the news, that Mikey was really dead. And she would never see her youngest brother again, up until now.

"Can we see him?" Donnie whispered, breaking up the hug. April sheepishly pulled out of the hug and dried her tears before turning towards Donnie and nodding. Raph was frozen, unable to process what he had just heard, while Leo and Donnie were shocked.

"Yea" April nodded and walked towards her door. "Just be careful with him, don't make any sudden movement, and don't touch him when he doesn't want to" She instructed before leading them to her living room, remembering the last time she did.

Mikey was still sitting on the couch, with the same fearful expression on his face, and Casey was sitting on the edge, closely watching Mikey but not being too close. April slowly stepped inside of the room, together with Leo, Raph and Donnie.

They stopped when their eyes landed on Mikey. He was really alive. All those months, all the time they thought he was dead, every day they had cried and missed their little brother, he was alive. And they had abandoned him all this time.

They all wanted to run towards him, hug their little brother but his fearful expression stopped them, the bandages, the sweat and the dirt covering his body. Donnie gasped In horror and brought his hand towards his mouth, tears forming in his eyes.

"You're alive" Leo breathed out, unable to say anything more. Mikey's head slowly lifted and looked Leo directly in the eyes, his baby blue eyes trembling with fear. Rap hesitantly stepped forwards, his knees buckling beneath him but he pushed past the feeling. All that mattered was Mikey.

"Oh Mikey, what did those bastards do to you?" Raph whispered. He was angry, his blood was boiling but in some way he couldn't let it out. He could only stare towards Mikey, his stomach turning painfully every time he trailed his eyes along the bandages.

He had no idea who this did, but he knew that if he ever saw them, they wouldn't be leaving alive. He would make them pay and there was no denying that feeling, but he couldn't get angry, not now, how much he wanted to, all he could see was his scared little brother, alive.

Raph was the first one to move towards his little brother. His steps slow and sloppy. A loud and threatening hiss escaped Mikey's mouth as Raph neared him, and Raph immediately froze, looking over to Mikey with sadness in his eyes.

He couldn't believe Mikey was actually hissing towards him, sure they were turtles, and they had all hissed before but never this violent, not towards another brother. It was filled with so much fear, fear for his brother approaching him, but also anger.

Slowly Raph kneeled in front of Mikey, just inches away from him, while Mikey kept his teeth bared, but Raph could see he was terrified. He was trembling and he was clawing his own hands, trying to look strong.

"Mikey it's me" He whispered, his voice cracking slightly. It couldn't be true, Mikey was dead, they saw the blood, his broken weapons, they never found him, they even 'buried' him without his body, and yet he was right in front of him, inches away.

"Is it okay if I…..? " Raph trailed off, his voice quivering. Slowly he raised his hand, bringing it towards Mikey's knee. The freckled turtle was looking at the hand, following every action as Raph neared his knee.

Nobody dared to say anything as Raph slowly placed his hand on Mikey's knee. A violent shiver went down Mikey's spine and his head shot up, looking into Raph's eyes. Tears formed in Mikey's eyes as another shiver wracked down his spine.

"Don't cry" Raph cracked but tears were threatening to spill too. He was real, it was Mikey. He knew it, he just knew it. Mikey's lip began to quiver and he slowly and faintly nodded, shaking heavily. His hands were shivering and tears were building up.

Raph slowly stood up, not wanting to scare his little brother and sat next to him. Mikey never moved away, he tensed slightly but never turned away from his older brother. Raph spared no second and wrapped his arms around Mikey, carefully.

Mikey was tense in his hold but not even a second later he completely relaxed, falling entirely into his hold and crying in Raph's plastron.

"I'll never let you go again Mikey, never again" Raph whispered in Mikey's ears, pressing him closer to himself. Donnie slowly stepped towards Mikey and Raph, unsure what to do. "Is it okay for Donnie to come?" Raph whispered as he looked over to Donnie.

Mikey slowly nodded in Raph's arms but he kept holding onto Raph, too afraid to let go. Raph nodded towards Donnie and the purple banded turtle made his way over to Mikey, resting his hand on Mikey's shoulder.

Mikey shakily turned towards Donnie, his tears still streaming down his face. A small nod was the only thing Donnie needed before he wrapped his arms around Mikey's fragile body, squeezing it slightly. He was back, he didn't know how but at the same time he didn't care, his only little brother was back with him.

"What are you waiting for Leo?" April whispered as she walked up to Leo. Tears were streaming down his face as he watched his 3 little brothers hugging each other, faint smiles on their faces while Mikey had his eyes squeezed shut, afraid, disorientated and confused.

Leo shrugged slightly, wiping his tears away. April sighed slightly and then wrapped her arms around her mutant friend, pressing her face against Leo's plastron. "Thanks April" Leo said as he pulled April closer, stroking her hear slightly.

"That's what family's for, now go" She said, grinning slightly and almost shoving Leo towards Mikey. She stepped closer to Casey. He wrapped his arm around April, drawing her closer while Leo made his way over to Mikey.

He sat down next to Donnie and wrapped his arms around him, resting his hand on Mikey's familiar shell. They stayed quiet for a long time, nobody saying anything and hugging each other. Mikey crying in between them, burying his face in the hug and eventually passing out from exhaustion.

**TMNT**

**So that's it, the reunion, hope it was emotional enough :3  
>Anyways, I just want to say, thanks everyone for following and reviewing so far, and I'll see you on Thursday again xD <strong>


	5. Chapter 5

**Test week is finally over! :D Which means update! Hope you enjoy the chapter and thanks for everyone reviewing so far! ^^**

**TMNT**

It took him a while to realize, all of them. Raph felt Mikey pressing against his plastron but he was too busy, his mind spinning as he hugged his sleeping brother. He had been near depression when his little brother died, he was so close.

There was so much blood, just too much. And he would never forget the look on Donnie's face. Full of horror and sadness, and without words they knew they had been too late, that he had broken the promise he had made so long ago, to protect his little brother.

"Raph" April's voice suddenly sounded, snapping him out of his trance. A cold hand was on his shoulder but he immediately recognized it as April's. A chocked hiccup came from Raph's throat as he wiped away the tears with his hand, while the other one was still holding Mikey.

And only then he realized his little brother had his eyes shut, the trembling had stopped but he was still twitching slightly. His breathing was shallow but steady, indicating he was asleep. Leo's arms were wrapped around Donnie, while they were both silently crying but smiles on their faces.

They were faint, and the smile was mixed with tears of both relief, confusion and horror. Mikey was alive, just inches away and they all knew they were never letting him go again, but the bandages and his emotional state freaked them out, he was so scared that he wouldn't even let Raph touch him at first.

Hissing like some kind of animal, an animal they had all vowed not to be. The animal they were all struggling to hide. But they also knew, that no matter how much human knowledge and traditions they had, most humans would always consider them animals, and right now his captors had managed to turn him into that.

"G-Get something warm… a blanket or somethin'" Raph said, trying to hide a shiver as he pulled out of the hug. Mikey's eyes were closed but he was far from peaceful, moaning in his sleep slightly and occasionally twitching.

April was the first one to react as she sprinted out of the room, returning seconds later with her pillow and blanket. Leo and Donnie stood up from the couch but Donnie kept holding Leo's arm tightly, afraid to let go, as April placed the pillow on the couch.

"Thanks April" Raph whispered, he'd curse himself for his weak voice but right now he couldn't care less. He slowly took the back of Mikey's head, holding him like a baby as he slowly lowered him on the big pillow. A flash of relief crossed over Mikey's face at the feeling of the soft pillow.

"What happened to his arms?" Donnie whispered as Raph placed the blanket on top of Mikey's form, placing Mikey's arms on top of it, knowing that he never liked to have his arms under the blanket if he would get injured or sick.

"The chains did" April said in a low voice as she walked over to Mikey's sleeping form, kneeling and picking up his right arm. She carefully un-wrapped them to show the damage they had done. The blood had been washed away already, and now all that was left were the scars and the tender flesh filled with healing wounds.

"I'm going to kill them" Leo hissed as he saw the full extent of his injury. April sighed and re-wrapped them again, very carefully as Mikey began to stir in his troubled sleep, trying to fight April off but failing miserably. His exhausted body simply not allowing him to.

"Don't Leo. He needs you right now" April whispered as she reached for his other arm, undoing the wrappings around his under-arm, revealing the large surgical scar. "He got the same on his legs, and his other arm is full off needle marks" She said, hiding the scar under the bandages again.

"What did they do to you baby bro?" Donnie whispered, walking over to Mikey and stroking his cheek slightly. Mikey whimpered under his touch slightly but showed no sign of waking up. April placed a comfortable hand on Donnie's shoulder.

"it will be alright Donnie… Mikey will pull through" April said, leaning towards Donnie and resting against his plastron. Donnie sighed and drew April closer, not really noticing what he was doing himself. He could only focus on Mikey, and the troubled look on his face.

**TMNT**

Raph's hands were firmly around Mikey's small hand, not daring to let him go. He never left his side, not in all these hours. April had offered them to stay at her house, something they had gratefully accepted, Mikey wasn't ready to be moved yet.

He was out cold and the sudden change in environment wouldn't do anything good. And he needed his rest, he was clearly beyond exhausted so waking him up was no option either. But April had assured them it was no problem, and they could stay until her aunt came back, which was in 3 days.

April, Casey and Donnie had been the first to sleep, so Leo and Raph could take the first round of watching Mikey. None of them wanted to leave Mikey alone but April and Casey wanted to give his brothers some time alone, and Donnie was already exhausted from staying up late the previous night.

Of course he wouldn't admit it, and it took them a lot of convincing until he agreed to sleep. For the past 4 hours they had watched Mikey. Both of them never leaving his side. They listened to every silent whimper Mikey would let out, every twitch and every flash of horror that crossed his face in his sleep.

"We failed him Raph…. He suffered all this time" Leo whispered after 4 long hours of silence. Raph slowly lifted his head, taking his eyes off Mikey's sleeping form but never letting go of Mikey's hand. Raph wasn't surprised to see the usual guilt in Leo's eyes.

He had seen that look so many times in his life, too many times for his liking. Every time one of them would get hurt, or sick, or anything at all happened to one of his brothers, he would go crazy and blame himself.

Every scratch, every bruise he blamed himself for. No matter how someone got it. Even when it was their fault, Leo blamed himself for not protecting his brothers, and right now his eyes were filled with that same look, and for once Raph couldn't object.

They did fail him. They left him for death. Not even thinking for one second he could be alive. Never wondering where the body was, or why Shredder would even do such a thing. And even Raph was suffocating himself with the guilt.

Raph bowed his head in disgust, closing his eyes painfully. "I know" he breathed out, not knowing what he could possibly say. No matter how you twisted it, he failed, failed to protect his little brother from getting hurt, had broken his most important promise.

Before any of them could say anything Mikey suddenly stirred in Raph's hold, gasping and trashing with his arms. Immediately Raph and Leo jumped up, concerned for their little brother. Raph tightened his grip on Mikey's hand.

"Calm down Mikey, you're safe" Leo whispered, placing a hand on Mikey's forehead to calm him down. But Mikey continued to trash, trying to pull his arm away from Raph and trying to fend off Leo's hand, failing miserably.

Suddenly Mikey shot up, immediately withdrawing his arm and hugging it close to his body. His plastron was heaving, trying desperately to get it breathing under control as fresh tears rolled down his face. His hands were clawing at his skin, gritting his teeth slightly.

He was trembling and shaking and slowly his fingers trailed towards his wrist but froze when he touched the bandaged instead of the chains. He hissed slightly when he felt the familiar pain shooting down his spine as he touched or moved it but he tried to stiffen it.

"Mikey?" Raph whispered, watching his little brother with great concern. Mikey's head shot to the right, staring wide-eyed at his two brothers. Immediately another hiss escaped his lips and he scrambled backwards, threatening to stay away from him.

"Easy Mikey… it's me, Raph" Raph whispered, raising his hands as a sign he wouldn't hurt Mikey. Uncertainty was written on Mikey's face and he was baring his teeth, warning them not to come closer but after a few seconds he loosened slightly and his lip starting to quiver.

He lowered his head in shame as a sob past his lips. Raph slowly moved towards Mikey, hesitating slightly before wrapping his arms around Mikey's shivering body. And again Mikey allowed him, burying his face in Raph's plastron.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6 already! I just wanted to say thank you all so much for reviewing this story, it means the world to me! And for the ones asking what happened to him, that will come eventually ;)**

**TMNT**

When they pulled out once again, Mikey had stopped crying. Only the red eyes indicating he was ever. He was avoiding any eye contact, too ashamed or just too scared to do so. Raph and Leo exchanged some glanced, both not entirely sure what to do. After a while Leo stepped forwards.

"Mikey.." he softly called out, placing a hand on his shoulder carefully, smiling slightly when Mikey didn't pull away. "If you need anyone to talk about what happened… you have to know where are here for you, you'll never be alone again" He offered.

Mikey slowly nodded, indicating he understood but never even tried to open his mouth. Instead he kept his lips sealed, staying completely silent. Again Leo and Raph exchanged a quick glance, out of all of them, Mikey was the one to talk the most.

Before he disappeared he never knew how to shut up, and would drive anyone crazy in the lair, but right now he wasn't talking, not the slightest word or even attempt to talk. And that worried the brothers a lot, and it only indicated how badly Mikey was hurt mentally.

"Mikey" Leo started after a few moments of silence. "Do you… do you trust us enough to take a bath, I'm sure you'll feel better once you get rid of all the dirt." He explained, gesturing to all the dirt and dried blood on his arms and legs, not to mention the smell.

A flash of true horror crossed his face and within seconds he was heaving again. His eyes were wide and he was desperately trying to clutch to either Raph's or Leo's hand. Raph took Mikey's hand and started to squeeze it slightly.

"Easy Mikey" Raph whispered, stroking Mikey's hand like he would always do to calm him down. "Nobody is going to hurt you, we'll do it like always, you can lean against me okay?" Raph continued, looking towards his little brother.

"I promise Mikey, as long as I'm breathing no one will ever hurt you. Ever." Leo assured his little brother, nudging him close. Mikey whimpered slightly but eventually nodded his head, indicating he was okay with Raph and Leo bathing him, although there was still doubt in his eyes.

"Alright squirt, let's get ya cleaned up" Raph called, trying not to sound too harsh for Mikey as he stood up, offering Mikey a hand. His little brother was hesitant for a while but eventually reached out for his older brother, taking Raph's hand.

Leo threw Mikey's arm over his shoulder, while Raph took the other one and together they carried him towards April's bathroom. If there was one thing that April had pointed out it was that they shouldn't do anything Mikey didn't like, and one of that being carried around.

So even when Mikey's legs were buckling beneath him, struggling to take even the slightest step, not Raph nor Leo attempted to lift Mikey up. The freckled turtle was panting but carried on nevertheless, never even complaining.

After a short walk they reached the bathroom and the brothers slowly took Mikey inside, not bothering to close the door, figuring Mikey could feel trapped because of that. Leo untangled himself from his little brother and walked over to the large tub, turning on the warm water, but not too warm.

"Alright Mikey, just relax okay?" Raph whispered as he slowly took Mikey to the tub, that was quickly filled with hot water. Leo took over Mikey so Raph could slip into the tub himself. The water was the perfect temperature, and Raph couldn't contain a smile himself.

With sloppy movements Mikey climbed into the tub, Leo needing to hold him while he did so, but even the slightest attempt to lift Mikey earned him a hiss already. Eventually he was in the tub and slipped fully in the water, against Raph's plastron, both sitting straight up.

Mikey had his eyes closed and he was shivering heavily, from the fear. "I think he has a bad experience with water" Leo whispered towards Raph as he picked up a soft sponge. "Mikey, I'm going to wash off the dirt okay? Just tell me when to stop" He said, hoping Mikey would actually start talking, but Mikey nodded again.

Raph wrapped his arms around Mikey's fragile body as Leo carefully began to scrub his arms, avoiding the bandages. They stitches were waterproof but the bandages weren't, so they would need to be replaced afterwards.

They were silent as Leo's slowly brushed off all the dirt and dried blood on Mikey's body, revealing the sea green skin they remembered. Mikey whimpered slightly as Leo began working on his head and Leo quickly lowered the sponge.

"What's wrong?" Leo whispered, looking over to Mikey's eyes. "You don't like the water don't you?" Leo asked when he got no response from Mikey. The freckled turtle closed his eyes in embarrassment but slowly nodded.

"Don't be embarrassed little bro" Leo said gently as he tipped Mikey's chin up. "I won't soak it in water, so there won't be too much water, is that okay?" And again, instead of talking Mikey nodded again, the same slow and slightly hesitant nod.

Leo sighed and squeezed most of the remaining water out of the sponge. Whatever they did to Mikey wasn't something good. He always loved the attention, he loved when they gave him a bath but right now he was terrified, for the water to be precise.

Leo shook his head and just continued to wash all the dirt off his little brother, and by the time they were done it was almost like he had never been gone. Apart from the bandages at least. Leo helped him out the tub and wrapped a towel around him, drying him.

"That wasn't that bad" Raph said as he dried himself with another towel. Mikey didn't respond and just looked away when Leo dried him, they did it so many times when they were young, and occasionally when they got older, if one of them would get sick or hurt, but right now Mikey was obviously not comfortable.

"Let's change those bandages okay?" Leo asked as he placed a comfortable hand on Mikey's shoulder. Immediately Mikey tensed and his head shot around, but he could contain a hiss when he saw it was Leo. He relaxed slightly and another slow nod came from him.

Raph and Leo exchanged some glances before they both took one of Mikey's arms, helping him with walking. Mikey's head was lowered as they walked him towards the living room again, settling him on the couch. Raph sat next to him and gently grabbed his right arm while Leo grabbed the medical kit.

"Don't be scared little bro. He won't hurt ya" Raph whispered in Mikey's ear as Leo slowly un-wrapped the wet bandages around his wrists. Mikey started trembling again and he buried his face in Raph's plastron, whimpering slightly but never withdrawing his arm.

He was scared, trembling in Raph's hold as Leo replaced the bandages with clean ones. Never daring to look at the wounds on his arms. Only whimpering whenever Leo touched them, even the slightest touch. Leo swallowed painfully when he replaced every bandage.

April was right about the needle marks, and they seemed to be everywhere on his arm. The area swollen and red, and clearly very sensitive as Mikey whimpered every time Leo touched it, even if it was a very faint touch.

"All done" Leo said and smiled slightly. Mikey slowly lifted his head, revealing the tears streaming down his face. He swallowed uneasily and seemed to doubt for a second before a faint smile appeared on his face, which disappeared not even a second later.

"I think that's enough for today" Leo said when he noticed the tiredness lingering in Mikey's eyes. Mikey nodded slightly and looked down. Raph got the message and stood up, helping Mikey lay down and tugging him in carefully.

A sob escaped Mikey's lips and he quickly turned around, his shell towards Leo and Raph. Raph wanted to reach for him, comfort him but Leo stopped him and shook his head. Mikey needed this, some time alone without anyone interfering.

They were lucky Mikey accepted their help, figuring everything the had gone through, but they couldn't push him, not now. Raph seemed to understand this and nodded sadly, glancing towards his little brother.

"Why won't you talk Mikey?" He whispered, unable for Mikey to hear.


	7. Chapter 7

He couldn't sleep. They had expected him to sleep, but he couldn't. He was exhausted and he had been up for so long right now, but still he wasn't tired, not enough to sleep anyways. All he could think about was the abused form of his little brother.

His presumed dead brother. It had been a full year already, a full year of missing him, being the only one of the 'B team' And he had missed his only little brother every second of that year, Every day he had woken up, and every night that passed. but in a way he had accepted it.

He learned to live with the silence, the mood around the lair which had changed so much the last year. It was never the same without Mikey's laughter. The sound of him playing video games or the screams that echoed through the lair when Raph was chasing him, again.

He missed every single noise of it. And he would die just to hear it one more time, anything. A cry, a laugh, even a single word would mean the world to him, but they never granted him that, his little brother, Mikey. He left, without being able to make any noise.

Shredder had brutally slaughtered him, the whole park had been covered in blood. And right then he had cursed his medical knowledge. He knew how much blood someone could lose, but the amount of blood that was on the grass, mixed with Mikey's nun chucks, it was too much.

There was no questioning he had bled to death. Shredder had sent Mikey's shattered mask, along with his gear the next day. All were stained with blood and the last cries of his little brother. He still had the CD. The disk that held Mikey's last cries.

So many times Donnie had played it, how much it hurt him. The cries were full of pain, and they eventually died out. Blood could be heard, the blood they found in the park. There was just so much, and even the rest knew there was no way Mikey had survived. But he listened to it, just to hear Mikey's voice again.

The cries were the last sounds his little brother had ever made, up until now. He didn't believe it when April told him. Mikey had been dead so long, he had given up already, he had accepted it but then everything changed when he saw his little brother, sitting on the couch.

It couldn't be real. His little brother had died, but yet he was there, sitting right in front of him and hurt. Fear written all over his face. He had no idea what had happened to him, but he knew it was all his fault. They had left him, without checking the blood was his.

He groaned slightly and sat up, looking around the room. He was lying on a mattress in the spare room in April's aunt's house. On the other side of the room was Casey, fast asleep. His mouth was partly open and he was snoring slightly, his arm covering his eyes.

Slowly Donnie brought his three-fingered hand to his face and rubbed his eyes. He sighed slightly and eventually stood up, tying his mask around his head and walking outside, he hadn't even bothered to take his other gear off during the night. He couldn't get any sleep, even if he wanted to.

Using his ninja training he walked outside the room without waking Casey, and walked towards the living room. Leo and Raph were sitting on chairs next to the couch, both sad expressions on their faces. Tears lingering in their eyes but far from falling.

"How is he?" Donnie whispered as he approached his brothers. Leo and Raph both lifted their heads slowly. The troubled looks on their faces already said enough, but honestly he wasn't expecting something else. Mikey's mind had been shattered, he was mentally broken.

"He woke up half an hour ago, and we cleaned him before he went to sleep again." Leo said shortly, not even bothering to lecture Donnie about waking up, before returning to the sleeping form of Mikey again. Sweat was trickling down Mikey's head and his face was contracted with pain but the dirt and blood was gone.

"He was terrified Don, I think they did something with water" Leo added after a few seconds, his voice pained as he remembered the terrified whimpers of his little brother. Donnie sighed and walked over to the couch, sitting on the edge. Carefully he placed his hand on Mikey's forehead.

His head was a bit warmer than normal but for now that wasn't something they were worried about. Mikey whimpered in his sleep, tossing slightly and trying to get the hand away but he kept sleeping, never awakening.

Suddenly Donnie's head shot up. "Has anyone called Splinter?" He whispered, his eyes wide when realization hit him. Leo and Raph seemed to have the same reaction, their eyes widening with fear and disbelieve. They had forgot about their own father.

"I can't believe it..." Leo hissed and immediately grabbed his t-phone. "I'm such a horrible.." Leo said, mentally beating himself up when Raph put a hand on his shoulder, shaking his head slightly. Leo glanced over to Raph, trying to keep his emotion in check.

"Don't think about that Leo... just call him right now" Raph said, turning towards Mikey. "He needs to see him too, right now" Leo nodded slightly before quickly dialing his father's number and calling him. Mikey's whimpering died out a little but Donnie never pulled his hand back.

He felt so bad for his little brother, the moment Donnie first saw him, he knew he was terrified. His baby blue eyes were filled with fear and his body covered with blood and dirt. His arms and legs bandaged and he was afraid. Every touch and every sound freaked him out already.

Donnie and Raph watched how Leo quickly left the room, his t-phone pressed against the side of his head, waiting for his dad to pick up. Leaving Donnie and Raph alone with their sleeping brother.

"Why won't he talk Don?" Raph whispered once Leo was gone. Raph's head slowly lifted, revealing his tear-stained eyes. Donnie could feel his stomach turning painfully. He noticed his little brother hadn't talked the time they had seen him.

But hearing he hadn't talked at all when he was gone, hurt him. He allowed Raph and Leo to bathe him, he trusted his brothers to touch him and yet, he never spoke. Not even a single word escaping his lips, trying to say something, or asking for something.

"I don't know Raph… " Donnie sighed in defeat. He had absolutely no idea why Mikey wouldn't talk. Mikey trusted them, he knew he did. But for some reason, Mikey didn't want to talk, or he wasn't up to it yet. And he didn't want to talk just yet.

"Do you think… they did somethin' to him, like cutting out …" Raph stopped mid-sentence and looked away. He couldn't think about it. The possibility of his baby brother never being able to speak again, it scared him. And he had no idea how it would affect Mikey himself.

But they could've done it, to end all the screams he was letting out. Just cutting out his tongue, or his voice box so he would never be able to scream or talk ever again. They could do whatever they wanted to do, without having to listen to his cries for the sweet relief, begging to make the pain go away and leaving him alone.

"I don't think so" Donnie whispered, slowly revealing the neck of Mikey. "He doesn't have any scars on his neck and ….he still has his tongue" Tears appear in Donnie's eyes and he quickly covers his little brother with the blanket, who immediately grabbed it, curling his body around it but still not waking.

"So why won't he talk Don? I don't understand" Raph said, totally lost. He wanted to hear his voice again. He wanted to hear the familiar laughter of him, or the taunts he would always make. He would even be happy with a single world, anything.

"Raph, whatever happened to him…. They dissected him, and chained him. He has been in that lab for a whole year. Experimented on, cutting into him and studying him…" He swallowed tickly, a lump forming in his chest, his heart painfully beating against his plastron.

He just couldn't believe someone would do something like this. He couldn't believe someone could be so ruthless, chaining and muzzling him. They dissected him, and Donnie didn't even know if he was awake or not during the process. And he couldn't imagine the pain his little brother went to, both physical and mental.

"And we left him for death… he waited for us all this time" Raph almost screamed but contained himself for Mikey's sake. His fingers were bailed into tight fists, his knuckles turning white and tears streaming down his face. He had left his baby brother, left him for death.

He had been so devastated by the death of his little brother, that he didn't think about the possibility he was still alive. He too listened to the CD that was sent to them, and even he didn't think that Mikey could still be alive. Mikey was counting on them, hoping for them to come every day, but they never did.

Shredder had burned his body, at least he said that. And not even Donnie checked if the blood was Mikey's, and suddenly all became clear. It wasn't Mikey's blood, not all of it. Raph gritted his teeth. Mikey suffered because he'd been too lazy, too lazy to check if it was Mikey's blood, or why Shredder would do such a thing.

"Don't cry Raph" Donnie whispered as he wrapped his arms around Raph's shoulder, squeezing slightly. "Mikey will get better, it isn't your fault" Raph whimpered slightly and burrowed his face in Donnie's plastron, trying to hold back his tears, but they kept flowing. How much he hated it.

Donnie swallowed tickly again, forcing his own tears back. His grip on his immediate older brother tightened slightly, pressing him tighter against his plastron. In the other room he could hear Leo talking to his father in Japanese, but he was too busy with Raph to notice what he was saying, and eventually the conversation ended.

"Sensei is on his way, he'll be here in a few minutes" Leo said, walking into the room again. Donnie looked up to Leo but Raph kept his face burrowed in Donnie's plastron. The purple banded turtle didn't seem to mind, Raph needed someone to hold onto now, not that he would ever admit it.

"We should wake before Sensei gets here" Raph suddenly said, pulling out of the hug. He carefully wiped his tears away, trying to act like it hadn't happen. Leo nodded slightly, understanding. If father would come, he would want to see Mikey, awake and alive. And suddenly waking him would only frighten him even more.

Raph nodded back before carefully walking over to the sleeping form of his little brother. His shell was still towards them, his arms were folded around the blanket, clinging to it like his life depended on it. Raph carefully placed a hand on Mikey's shoulder, nudging it slightly.

"Mikey, buddy?" He whispered, keeping his voice low so he wouldn't startle him. Mikey whimpered slightly in his sleep, stirring slightly but not waking up yet. "You have to wake up Mikey, dad will be here soon, you want to see him right?" Raph said, trying to get Mikey to wake up.

He nudged his shoulder again, harder this time. Mikey's eyes flew open and he let out a frightened sound, a mix of a hiss and a scream. He turned on his shell within seconds, scrambling backwards and bringing his blanket up to his plastron, trembling and his eyes wide with fear.

"Mikey?" Donnie whispered, walking up to his little brother and lowering himself, so he wouldn't frighten him too much. Slowly the big baby blue eyes trailed from Raph to Donnie, watering in the process. Tears staining them. Mikey's plastron was rising and falling quickly, way too quickly.

His mouth was partly open, trying to suck in all the oxygen he could get. None of them said anything, Donnie only staring at the terrified look on Mikey's face and his trembling form. They did so much to him, things he didn't even know yet, but he knew they did things. And it honestly made his blood boil with anger.

"Mikey, don't be scared please" Raph whispered as he painfully watched his brother heaving with fear. He carefully stood up again, reaching out for his little brother slowly, just as they did the previous night. Raph's fingers were shaking, his eyes focused on Mikey's eyes.

"It's …" Raph started, trying to comfort him but was unable to finish. His hand neared Mikey and suddenly a loud hiss escaped Mikey's lips, harder and more scared than ever, threatening his older brother and with one swift movement he shot up, jumping towards Raph and knocking him backwards.

Raph let out a small grunt of pain when his shell was forced into the glass table behind him from the force. A loud shattering sound rang through the whole house and Raph's shell hit the ground with a loud bang, glass being crushed beneath it.

"Mikey what are ya….?!" Mikey growled dangerously and bared his teeth, pressing his thumbs against Raph's neck and applying pressure. Raph's face flushed with fear, feeling the oxygen being cut off. His hands tried to take Mikey's hands off but the grip was too strong, Mikey was too strong.

He gasped, trying to take in the oxygen but he couldn't get any. Mikey's eyes were narrowed with determination but fear was present too. The same fear that would be in his eyes after a nightmare, or after a dangerous attack, but it was way worse this time. He was absolutely petrified.

Tears were starting to leak down Mikey's cheeks as he continued to press against Raph's throat, every second a little bit more pressure. Raph was clawing at Mikey but his baby brother wouldn't let him go, and slowly Raph could feel his limps giving in to the loss of oxygen and his vision was slowly starting to get black.


	8. Chapter 8

_He was screaming as loud as he could. Screaming and begging for them to stop, to let him go, free him and let him get back to his brothers. His voice was raw from all the screaming, his lungs burning and telling him to stop, but he continued to scream, screams that were broken by the muzzle strapped to his face. _

_The chains were cutting into the back of his head, but nothing could prepare him for the pain that was yet to come. He was strapped down on the operation table. His legs tied down by thick leather straps and his arms next to his side, his underarm being presented. _

_A large line had been drawn with a marker on his left arm, and he knew what was coming. He was trashing as hard as he could but the straps were preventing any movement in his limps. The only thing he could do was smash his shell against the table, trying to get loose, but all his attempts were in vain. _

_Thick tears were rolling down his cheeks as they approached him. 2 men and 1 woman. They all wore lab coats and a cap in front of their mouths, and none seemed to pay attention to the cries, begging for them to stop, they were only focused on the fascinating creature in front of them. _

_He knew what was coming, but never could he have been prepared for the pain. Even when the tip touched his skin, pain shot through his body. His shell was slamming back and forth on the table, screaming into the muzzle, pain washing all over him. _

_An animal, that was all he was in their eyes. They never gave him a sedative to ease the pain, not even a local one, nothing to take the edge off. The scalpel easily sliced into his skin, cutting open his whole underarm, blood oozing down. _

_"Animal" _

_"Filth"_

_"Freak" _

_Tears continued to stream down his face, it hurt, it hurt so much but none of them cared. They carefully placed pins in between the cut, forcing the two sides apart and presenting the insides. He wanted to gag at the sight. He could see his own bone, the muscles and tissue protecting it. _

_Hands were nearing him, touching and feeling the exposed flesh. He arched his back on the table again, squeezing his eyes shut as he let out another icy scream. His muscles were burning, his whole body aching, and pain clouding his mind. The images of his brothers were the last thing he saw before he blacked out from the pain. _

**TMNT**

A low groan escaped his lips. He could feel hands around him, helping him up but the only thing he could focus on was the burning pain in his throat. He opened his mouth slightly, sucking in as much oxygen as he could, immediately followed by a violent couch.

"Easy my son" Splinter's voice cut in. Raph's face was crunched up with pain and he winched slightly. He felt himself being lifted into a sitting position and a glass being pushed against his mouth. Raph groaned and fluttered his eyes open, looking around in confusion.

His father and Leo were next to him, supporting him and keeping him up while Casey and Donnie were carefully cleaning up the shattered glass in front of him, and April was holding a glass to his lips, urging him to drink. Raph took a deep breath and took the glass from April, slowly drinking it.

The cold water eased the burning sensation in his throat slightly but the pain never left him. Leo had tears in his eyes as he reached for the glass, putting it aside and handing Raph 2 ibuprofen, to ease the pain in his throat.

"What… happened?" Raph rasped as he swallowed the pills without any water. Leo and Splinter both took an arm and helped Raph with sitting on the couch. Raph winced slightly and leaned with his shell against the couch, looking around.

"Do you remember that Mikey… attacked you?" Leo carefully began. Confusion washed over Raph's face but then realization hit him. He did remember it. The terrified expression in Mikey's eyes, mixed with so much anger and confusion.

The expression he wore when he was strangling him, and the shaking form when his thumbs pressed against his throat. Raph winced again and slowly brought his fingers up to his throat, feeling the warm and slightly swollen area.

"He tried to strangle you, luckily we got him off but you already blacked out. Casey and April came in because they heard the noise and Mikey fled towards April's room afterwards" Leo explained. Raph gazed down, he couldn't believe Mikey would do such a thing.

He wasn't blaming Mikey, far from it but he just wanted to know why. Why he would attack him and trying to kill by strangling him. Raph brushed his fingers against his throat and winced again, Mikey's grip had been so fierce, he would've killed him if Leo and Don hadn't helped him.

"He isn't letting anyone in the room, we've tried but he starts to hiss every time we enter." Tears appeared in Leo's eyes again, still clearly remembering all the threats that came out of his little brother's mouth, daring them to take just one step further.

"How long… was I out after.. ya know..?" Raph asked, unable to find the right words. He still couldn't believe his baby brother would try to kill anyone. He never killed in his life before, never. And right now he was ready to kill his own brother.

"Around 10 minutes, you came by a few minutes after father arrived" Leo said, looking away slightly. Raph looked down again and nodded slightly. The eyes, the eyes that always held such joy and laughter, they had been filled with so much hatred and fear.

He could still remember how they narrowed every second a little bit more. Tears leaking down his cheeks as he stared right into his own eyes. Hatred, the eyes were filled with hatred and all joy had been washed away, crushed under his captivity.

"Let me talk to him" Raph suddenly said. He slowly helped himself up, swaying slightly on his feet. Leo wanted to open his mouth to protest but Raph shook his head. "He hurt me Leo, he wasn't trying to kill ma.. well he was but he was scared" Raph explained, rubbing the back of his neck slightly.

"Look Leo, he was terrified when I approached him, he only tried to defend himself. You should've seen his eyes" Raph continued as he looked over to Leo. Raph sighed slightly. "I doesn't matter what you say Leo, I'm gonna talk to him" Raph said and was ready to walk away.

"Wait Raph!" Leo called after him. Raph stopped for a second, looking back to his older brother, expecting a lecture or anything. "Good luck" There was a faint smile on his face, and Raph returned it, nodding slightly before walking over to Mikey's room.

**TMNT**

Slowly Raph opened the door to April's room. The room was completely dark, all the light had been turned off. Raph opened the door a bit more, allowed light to shine into the room. Carefully he looked into the room, trying to find his baby brother.

"Mikey, ya there?" Raph whispered, taking a cautious step inside. He found his baby brother huddled in the corner, on top of April bed. His knees were drawn up to his chest and he was hugging them tightly. His eyes were wide with fear and he was looking directly towards Raph.

"Hey Mikey" Raph said in a low tone, taking another step inside the room. Mikey tensed visibly but never threatened his brother to go away, which was a good sign. Raph slowly walked over Mikey, stopping at the end of April's bed and waiting patiently.

None of them said anything, both looking at each other for a few moments. Slowly Mikey turned his head away from Raph, facing the wall next to him and lowering his head in shame, tears appearing in his eyes and slowly streaming down.

"Don't be ashamed Mikey, I'm okay" Raph whispered, seeing the guilty look on his little brother's face. Slowly he climbed on top of the bed, scooting over to his younger brother. He stopped when his shoulder quickly brushed against Mikey shoulder but when Mikey didn't pull away he carefully wrapped his arms around his younger brother.

Mikey made no move to snuggle close to Raph, but he didn't pull away either, allowing his older brother to hug him. Raph didn't dare to move, he wanted to press his little brother closer, comfort him in any way possible but he knew that wouldn't be good, and it would only frighten Mikey more.

"Don't be sorry Mikey.. I should be fer scaring ya" Raph said, carefully wiping away the tears on Mikey's face, but new ones quickly replaced them. "Listen Mikey.. I don't know.. uhm.. if ya ever want to talk about what happened…" Raph cautiously brought up after a few silent minutes, not sure how to tell his baby brother.

"I know ya have been through a lot, and no one is expecting ya to forget it… but ya gotta know that we're her for ya bro, you can always talk" Raph could feel Mikey starting to tremble in his hold upon mentioning his captivity, imagines filling his mind again.

Raph felt a twinge of guilt and carefully reached for Mikey's hands, taking them in between his in an attempt to comfort him but Mikey immediately tensed up again, slapping Raph's hands away and pressing his shell tightly against the wall.

Raph's eyes widened when he saw Mikey's frightened reaction. He looked absolutely terrified, his teeth showing, and completely ready to use them if Raph would do anything else. His whole body trembling with fear and his shell painfully pressed against the wall.

"Mikey… I'm sorry. I should've known… don't be scared little bro" Raph tried, attempting to reach for him again but stopped when a terrified hiss escaped Mikey's lips, his teeth bared. His eyes were now filled with absolute terror, but also guilt and doubt, whether to attack him or not.

And Raph immediately knew he had blown his change with Mikey. He slowly moved backwards a little, creating distance between him and Mikey. The youngest turtle kept watching him, ready to attack him if necessary, but Raph kept his movements slow.

"I'm sorry bro.. I'll leave now, but I'll bring ya some water and food soon okay?" Raph said. Mikey's eyes lit up a bit when Raph mentioned the food but that immediately disappeared afterwards. Leaving the same eyes, filled with doubt, fear and uncertainty.

He had always been the stubborn one, but right now Raph knew he should be leaving. If he ever wanted Mikey to trust him fully again, he shouldn't press him. And Mikey's eyes were clearly asking him, begging him to leave. He was scared and confused, and Raph fully understood. He had been there for a whole year, at the mercy of those ruthless scientists.

Slowly Raph slipped of the bed, walking over to the door again. He walked outside and grabbed the door, slowly closing it while looking at his little brother, who was now rocking back and forth slightly, crying his heart out in utter silence.


	9. Chapter 9

_His body was aching so much, every time he tried to move pain would shoot down his spine. The cuts were treated but nothing was done to ease the pain in his body, his arm was throbbing so much, even after 2 full days it would bring him pain every time he would move it. _

_Tears were leaking down his face, his eyes red and puffy from everything. His throat was raw and hurting so much. He hadn't had any water for more than 2 weeks, 2 weeks he had been here already, and he wanted nothing more than to get out. _

_He wanted to go home again, hug his brothers and be safe. But importantly to get rid of the pain and humiliation. He was chained, muzzled and vivisected. Just a month ago he had still been home, celebrating their defeat on the Kraang, and it looked like it was already years away. _

_He could only remember the cold cell he was in the whole day, the chains wrapped around his limbs and the muzzle that was strapped on his face the first week already. His body was still with bruises from all the beating he had gotten. _

_He had begged them every day, pleading for them to let him go, and every time they would hurt him again, threatening him to shut up for once. And the second week they had muzzled him, permanently. Not matter how hard he'd struggled, he couldn't get the muzzle off his face. _

_ He didn't understand why his brothers weren't coming, they were looking for him, he was sure they were. But they weren't here, not yet. Not even after several weeks, they left him in the lab on his own, they left him with the scientists. _

_No, they wouldn't, they loved him. They would never leave him, they'd come for him. But they didn't, not yet. They were looking for him. He was sure they were, they would never stop looking. They would be here any day, and they would rescue him, get him out and go home safely. _

_But they didn't, not even for a whole year, and every day he lost hope. Every day they would drag him away, cut him open again or study him. They would strap him down almost every day, and if they didn't they left him alone in the cold cell, writhing in pain and crying for his brothers to come. _

_Days turned into weeks, and weeks into months, and they never came, and he couldn't help but to think they'd forgotten all about him. They never looked for him, tried to contact him, they didn't find him, not in all these months, and he had just given up. _

_His eyes snapped open when the door was opened again, two man stepping inside. He whined behind his muzzle, crawling into the corner and pressing his shell against the wall in utter fear. They would do it again, they would drag him away and cut him open again. _

_The two men didn't say anything and just walked over to him, both grabbing an arm and hovering him up, detaching the chains with electric pads. He whimpered slightly as he was forcefully dragged along the white halls. He struggled softly but he was just done. _

_His body was empty, scars littering his body. The muzzle had been on for so long, he couldn't remember the last time he had eaten something, they would always feed him through the needles, and keep the muzzle on every day, and every night. He was just too tired to struggle. _

_Within seconds he was strapped onto the operation table and he could only whine in protest, struggling to get out, despite knowing the attempts were futile. He never got out, not anytime in the past few months, and he could only wait for the pain to end, screaming and pleading for them to stop. _

_He dropped his head to the side. He knew what was coming. He glanced down to his arm, and was surprised they hadn't removed the bandages already. They would always cut open his original wound again, and it hurt. They would never give him something against the pain, it would only mess up their results. _

_"Prepare the scalpels" A shudder went through his spine. He didn't like it, he didn't like his voice, never had. His eyes snapped open when he felt his legs being touched, soaking them in alcohol. They couldn't, they wouldn't, but his blood ran cold when he felt lines being drawn on his legs. _

_The straps around his ankles were tightened and extra ones were placed over his knees, keeping him in place. They were approaching him, coming at him but they never touched his arm again, and before he could process what was happening, his shell was slamming against the table with incredible force. _

_He screamed against the muzzle, thrashing and flailing his limbs as hard as he could, it burned, it burned so much. They were cutting into his legs, one at each leg, drawing the same line as his arms, long and slow, agonizing pain washing all over him. _

_He was getting used to the pain in his arm, it was still so extremely painful, but he managed to keep conscious, he was bearing the pain, but nothing could've prepared him for this pain, it worse, double the pain he had ever felt. They were poking his muscles, taking samples of his bones, touching his bleeding flesh. _

_A strong hand was placed on his plastron, pushing him down to prevent him from slamming his shell one more time. His eyes widened. He recognized the hand, the green skin, the three fingers. His head snapped up, pain washing away from his body, suddenly feeling numb. _

_He was staring into the sea blue eyes, the same that would always be filled with compassion, and concern, were now filled with nothing. They were emotionless, his older brother didn't even flinch, holding him down without mercy as his brothers continued to cut into his legs. _

_He wanted to cry out again, asking why they were doing it but he could only stare at his brothers. Their hands holding the scalpels, his legs cut open and bloody. Blood all over their hands, his blood. And they looked at him, there was no regret in their expressions, they enjoyed hurting him. _

**TMNT**

Soft snores were coming from his older brother, but somehow he couldn't find any reason to sleep. He wasn't tired, but he had nothing else to do so he just lay there. A blanket was placed on both him and Leo, keeping them warm while they slept.

It had already been a full day since they had brought Mikey back home. They managed to give Mikey food, but none of them had been able to touch him, or even near him again. Only opening the door of Mikey's room to give him some food and water, occasionally asking if he needed anything else, but every time Mikey shook his head.

Leo was now sound asleep, his mouth partly open and soft snores coming from his mouth. April was in her aunt's bedroom, sleeping in her aunt's bed since Mikey was still occupying her bedroom, refusing to get out of the room, and too scared to do so.

They had found him in the evening, under the blankets and fast asleep, thrashing slightly against his blankets, whimpering in his sleep but never awakening. And they had decided to let him, he needed his rest, he needed to accept what had happened to him.

Donnie and Casey were in the same room as April, both occupying the two spare mattresses and Splinter in the spare room Casey and Donnie had used the night before. And with nowhere else to go, Leo and Raph decided to sleep on the couch. Leo had been out within a few minutes, having barely slept in the last day, but Raph had taken a nap so he wasn't tired himself.

All he could think about was the scarred body of his youngest brother. The animalistic hisses he would less out, threatening them, making sure they would keep away. He was just so afraid, and he refused to talk about what happened, he refused to talk at all.

And it broke Raph's heart. Mikey had always been the one to talk, in fact he could never be quiet, but right now he was just deadly silent, the only sounds being his muffled cries and the hissing. No word came from him, and he had no idea why he wouldn't talk.

Raph froze when suddenly a loud whimper came from April's room, and Raph immediately knew it was Mikey. Without waking Leo up he scrambled upwards a bit, until he was sitting his shell against the couch. He closed his eyes for a bit, trying to make out the noises.

Mikey was clearly whimpering and thrashing around, probably a nightmare. Raph was about to stand up, check if he was okay when an icy scream tore from Mikey's throat, filling the whole apartment. Raph could feel his whole body draining from blood, leaving him cold on the couch.

The scream was filled with so much hurt and fear. Raph shot up seconds after, completely ignoring the fact that Leo was waking up and dashed towards Mikey's room, restraining himself enough and slowly opening the door, not freaking Mikey out.

And what he saw absolutely broke his heart. Mikey was upright, sitting in his bed with the blankets still half on top of him. Sweat was trickling down his head and his eyes were wide with panic. Tears slowly appearing in the blue orbs.

"Mikey?" Raph's voice was so quiet but Mikey's head immediately shot up, tensing all over again. "Oh baby bro" He whispered. He wanted to hug him, run over to him and squeeze him, never letting him go but he knew he couldn't do that.

Slowly he took a few steps inside of the room. Being careful not to startle Mikey as he slowly made his way over to his baby brother. Mikey was watching every moment. His eyes still wide and tears pouring down his face, staining his cheeks.

"Don't cry Mikey" Raph cracked, slowly climbing on top of the bed and taking Mikey's hands. Massaging them and squeezing slightly. Mikey gazed down, refusing to look Raph in the eyes again, only watching how his hands were in between Raph's, his older brother easing them slightly, like he would always do.

"Was it a nightmare?" Raph whispered, glancing at the door as he noticed Leo and Donnie standing there, April, Casey and even Splinter behind them but none of them were even attempting to enter the room, all understanding it would only freak Mikey out.

Raph gave a short nod, saying it was okay before the door slowly closed, leaving Mikey and Raph alone in the room. The full moon the only thing illuminating the room, but it was enough to see Mikey's distressed face. Raph sighed and squeezed into Mikey's hands once more.

Slowly Mikey nodded, confirming it was a nightmare indeed. Again Raph sighed and gazed down for a moment. It was something they all knew was going to happen. They saw the scars all over his body, things happened to him and it was inevitable that he would have nightmares about it, bad ones.

"It's all good little bro, you're safe now. I won't let anything happen to ya" Raph said, tipping Mikey's chin up slightly. Mikey whimpered and struggled weakly to get out of Raph's grip and the red banded turtle immediately released him with a pained face.

Even that little movement, that little touch freaked him out already, and it hurt Raph to see him struggling against his own brother. He gave Mikey's hands a last comforting squeeze before very carefully pushing Mikey back on his shell, which he luckily allowed, and pulled the blanket up to his chin.

"I know you're terrified, and we don't expect you to tell anything Mikey, ya just gotta know we're here for ya" Raph said but sighed afterwards as Mikey turned his head away, biting his lip slightly and trembling in fear. "Sleep tight Mikey" Raph eventually said, standing up and walking towards the door.

It was obvious his little brother didn't want him here, he was just too afraid to have him around, and he fully understood that, He needed to accept everything that had happened to him. Everything he had gone through, without them being at his side.

Things happened to him in that lab. And they weren't there when it happened, they left him for over a year. He had been hurt by everyone he had seen in the last year, of course he wouldn't trust them. He wanted to reach for the door, open it and leave Mikey alone when a small voice stopped him.

"Raphie…?" Mikey's voice was raspy, raw and clearly unused, and so low Raph almost couldn't hear it, but it was there. He really spoke to him. His voice filled with uncertainty and fear. Raph immediately whipped his head around, looking into Mikey's eyes.

Mikey was still lying on his shell but was looking over to him, his arms trembling and watching him with his wide baby blue eyes. Tears were slowly starting to stream down. He didn't say anything else, but Raph knew that hopeless expression.

"You want me to… stay?" Raph whispered. He couldn't believe it, after a full year he was hearing his baby brother again. The same voice he remembered, extremely raw and clearly unused, but it was definitely his voice. His baby brother's voice.

Months he had missed that voice. The cheery and high pitched voice of his baby brother, always laughing and speaking excitedly, and right now it was raw and painful but Raph couldn't care less, he was feeling happy again, truly happy. Nights he had wished for this.

Wishing to hear that voice one more time. Anything would be good. A tiny word, a giggle, a complain, but they never granted him that wish, until now. He had always hated the nickname Mikey had given him. When they were younger he would love it.

It would make him feel special. The others always called him Raph, or Raphael but only Mikey was allowed to call him Raphie, but later on he grew to hate it, it was too childish, it didn't sound as tough as he wanted to be, and now he wanted Mikey to say it again.

A slow nod came from Mikey, tears still leaking down his face. He was beaming at him, his baby blue eyes filled with tears but hope and desperation, mixed with intense fear. Fear that he was trying to push down, but Raph could see it.

Raph slowly turned around fully, actually debating whether to go to Mikey or not but then a small smile crept on his face and he walked over to Mikey's bed, slowly climbing on top, his arm quickly brushing against Mikey, causing him to tense up.

Fear ripped through his body as he felt the faint touch but he forced himself to relax. Raph would never hurt him, he was his brother. And Raph wasn't about to let him go. The red banded turtle lay down next to Mikey's body and watching him closely.

Emotions were written over Mikey's face, doubt and uncertainty. He wanted to snuggle close to his brother, he really did but something was preventing him. Fear, memories, the nightmares. It would all start with them trapping him, restraining him and eventually cutting him open, breaking his bones, experimenting on him.

Mikey's body startle to tremble again and Raph carefully wrapped his left arm around Mikey's body, drawing him closer slightly. Mikey wanted to kick, scream, run, anything to get away from the suffocating feeling, he was forced closer against his brother, but with such kindness.

Something he had rarely seen with his older brother. Something he had missed for a whole year, someone to make him feel safe, care for him, let him free and let him do what he wanted, no chains and no muzzle. Raph's body was warm, and Mikey slowly moved a bit closer.

And for the first time in a whole year, he felt truly safe again. Raph would never hurt him, or let anyone hurt him. He never stopped crying as he curled up against Raph like he would always do when they were younger, burrowing his face in Raph's hold.

Raph carefully drew the blanket over both of them, tugging Mikey in again with his free arm. Mikey blinked a few times but relaxed when he noticed the warmth of the blanket surrounding him and closed his eyes again, nuzzling his beak against Raph's plastron and falling asleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**So I had this ready yesterday and I wanted to post it, and then the site decided to crash x) I don't know how many times I tried, but I'm pretty sure my mouse broke. But luckily it's working again, so here's the next chapter :D  
>And a thanks to everyone who reviewed and followed so far! <strong>

**TMNT**

He wanted this moment to last forever. Mikey was sleeping peacefully in his hold, as much as he could be peaceful. His face would sometimes crunch up with pain and fear, and sometimes he would weakly start to thrash but apart from that he was perfectly still.

His eyes closed and breathing softly against Raph's plastron. His beak almost touching the hard material covering his chest. Raph was watching his little brother in amazement and yet horror, glancing at all the scrapes that were still on his body, and the bandages wrapped around his arms and wrists.

He couldn't get himself to sleep, he was tired but ever since he had woken up some hours ago, he didn't want to fall asleep again. Watching his little brother closely, not daring to let him go anytime soon. Studying his face and his expressions.

He would make them pay, whoever did this to him, cut him open, chain him, muzzle and hurt him. He wanted nothing more than to rip out their throats, make them suffer and for once honor didn't matter, all that mattered was revenging Mikey's torments.

But for now he had to be there for Mikey. He was finally reaching out for them, seeking safety, and trusting them. And it warmed Raph that he was finally trusting him enough to be so close to him. Not shutting him out, and even nuzzling against him, he was still hesitant but even Raph couldn't deny his little brother was right next to him.

Slowly Mikey started to move slightly, whimpering and curling up more in his hold, burrowing his face in Raph's hold until even Raph was unable to see his face, only the slow whimpering indicating he was still here, and the warmth radiating from him.

"Easy little bro" Raph whispered and wrapped his arm a little bit tighter on Mikey's body. Immediately Mikey's head shot up, his eyes wide and staring at him, the strong arm around Mikey being the only thing preventing him from scrawling away.

When Mikey noticed it was Raph to pull him closer he relaxed slightly, lowering himself on Raph's plastron again but keeping his eyes open this time. And it pained Raph to see the same tears appearing in his eyes again, but not enough to let them drop.

Raph sighed slightly and wrapped his arm around Mikey again, carefully this time. And Mikey allowed it though never closing his eyes again. But he wasn't looking at Raph either, completely looking away from his older brother. They lay still for a few minutes and Raph only moved when he felt Mikey shifting beneath him.

Raph looked down when he felt something touch his neck, trailing along the rough skin. He hissed slightly at the stinging sensation and Mikey immediately withdrew his hand, guilt washing over his face as he looked away again. Raph slowly hovered himself up, so he could look better at his younger brother.

"Don't be Mikey" Raph whispered, he knew that look Mikey was giving him. He was blaming himself for his injury. For strangling him. "It doesn't really hurt, just sensitive, understood?" Mikey slowly looked up again, staring into his brother's eyes and slowly nodded, indicating he understood.

"Good" Raph said, smiling slightly at his younger brother before glancing towards the clock. It was already morning and he was sure Mikey was starting to get hungry, even he was feeling a little bit hungry and Mikey hadn't even touched most of his dinner, only a bit of his soup but the rest was still on his plate.

"Come on, you need to eat something" Raph suddenly said and carefully stood up, offering Mikey a hand. The younger brother hesitated, not accepting Raph's hand at first. Doubt, fear and guilt flashing over his face, and Raph immediately knew something was wrong.

"What's wrong Mikey?" Raph said, kneeling down so he was at the same height as Mikey, who was now sitting cross-legged on the bed. Raph forced himself to look at Mikey's face instead of all the cuts and bandages on his limbs, wrist and ankles, they horrified him but he didn't want to show Mikey.

"Are they….?" Mikey rasped, shutting his mouth the moment the words left his mouth. But Raph understood nevertheless. He was worried if his brothers were in the kitchen too. Raph sighed and grabbed Mikey's hands, squeezing them slightly.

"I think they are, but if you don't want them there I can ask if they leave." Raph offered, hoping Mikey would accept. It was understandable he wasn't ready to be confronted with all his brothers yet, and Raph had really expected him to nod, saying he indeed didn't want his brothers but instead he shook his head.

Raph couldn't contain the smile that was appearing on his face. Mikey was clearly scared about facing his brothers but he was determined to see them. "Yer doing good little bro" Raph smiled and held out his hand again, and this time Mikey accepted.

TMNT

Mikey was clutching Raph's hand as hard as he could, almost like his life depended on it as they walked into the kitchen. Mikey could feel the presence of his brothers nearing him. And it honestly freaked him out, being around so many people, even if there were only two.

None of them said anything as they entered the kitchen in April's house. Mikey tightened the grip on Raph's hand as he saw his brothers sitting around the table. Leo and Donnie on one side of the table, Both eating a simple breakfast, and both looking up when Raph and Mikey entered.

"Hey Mikey, Raph" Leo softly called out as Mikey did a few more steps into the kitchen together with Raph. But Leo also noticed the fear surrounding his brother's spirit, he was terrified, avoiding him most of the time. Raph nudged him slightly, giving him a comfortable squeeze.

"Hey" Mikey rasped uncertain, looking down immediately after that tiny word. And just with Raph, smiles spread among the faces of Donnie and Leo, hearing their baby brother's voice after all, it was raspy and clearly painful for him to use but it was his voice.

Mikey winced slightly and allowed Raph to lead him towards the chair, on the other side of Leo. He uncomfortably sat down and hugged his own arms close to his chest, unable to look up and face his brothers, gazing down in shame and fear.

"Casey and April are getting some groceries, do you want them to get something special?" Leo decided to break the silence, trying to assure Mikey that way. The freckled turtle slowly looked up, glancing over to Leo for bit but then nodded slightly, never opening his mouth again.

"What do you want?" Leo whispered, trying to get him to talk but Mikey merely shrugged his shoulders, gazing down again to avoid Leo's eyes, clearly not wanting to speak. And he should've known. Mikey refused to talk to them a whole day, not because he was mad, they all knew Mikey wasn't.

But he still refused to talk to them, though they still didn't know why, but now he had talked a bit didn't mean he would be talking all the time just like that, it would take time before he was the same again, and they had to be patient, allow Mikey to decide when he was ready or not.

Leo sighed slightly. "It's okay Mikey, if you don't feel comfortable you don't have to force or anything" Leo assured his little brother before standing up. "I'll make you some breakfast, you helping Raph?" Leo softly added, looking over to his immediate brother but then walking towards the kitchen.

Raph nodded a bit confused but followed Leo to the kitchen. He knew Leo was perfectly capable of making breakfast. It had always been Mikey's job, and they were honestly terrible at making breakfast but after Mikey had 'died' they all knew they had to do it themselves.

Their little brother wouldn't be making breakfast every day, he wouldn't be making dinner. Something he had always loved to do. Mikey was 'gone' so they had to learn to make breakfast themselves. All of them were able to make breakfast in a way, so there had to be a reason Leo wanted him to come with him.

"What happened last night?" Leo whispered as he reached for the refrigerator, looking for something he could make for Mikey. His voice was barely above a whisper, so Mikey wouldn't be able to hear their conversation, he didn't want to leave his brothers out, but this was something between Raph and him, and he would tell Donnie and Sensei later.

Their father had gone home after they had seen Mikey nuzzled close to Raph, and they had all seen how Mikey was slowly starting to trust them again, so Splinter had decided to go home again, to fetch some stuff from Mikey. When he 'died' they knew they had to sort out his room.

They didn't want to but it'd be too painful to be confronted with it all the time, so they had stacked all his belonging in boxes, planning on moving it elsewhere, but they never moved the stuff out, stashing it somewhere they wouldn't see it all the time. They couldn't do it.

It was the last thing they had, the last memory of their baby brother. They kept the bed, they kept the stuff in the boxes but never touching it. Only Splinter would sometimes reach out for Mikey's sketchbook. From all of his sons, Mikey was the only one to really honor his name.

His paintings were beautiful, and every time he found himself crying over the loss of his youngest son, seeing all the beautiful sketches and paintings Mikey would make. He wouldn't get mad, he wouldn't snap at anyone like his brothers would, he would draw to sort out his emotions, and they were absolutely beautiful.

April had gone through his stuff only one time, when they met Casey. At first they never told him about their lost baby brother, not even April, it was too painful to talk about that loss, and even though Casey knew something was wrong or missing, he never pushed it.

But after an encounter with Rahzar and Fish Face, they were forced to tell him. They had been taunting about Mikey's death, saying how they enjoyed hearing his screams as he slowly drowned on his own blood. The mutants barely escaped with their lives.

They were furious about it, and once they got home they all collapsed, mentally and emotionally exhausted. The memories of their baby brother crashing down on them again, the feel of failure, guilt, regret for letting him go out alone, and now Casey knew about Mikey.

It had been April to show Casey the pictures of Mikey. They had all collected it, all the pictures of Mikey and put them in a box. They didn't want to forget him, never in their life, but it was too painful to walk around the lair, seeing the huge smile of their deceased baby brother, only Splinter kept one in his room, next to the one of him, Miwa and Tang Shen.

Raph shook his head slightly, taking a deep breath and explained Leo what happened. How Mikey had woken up and how he was ready to leave when he noticed how terrified Mikey, but was stopped when Mikey called his old nick-name, practically asking him to stay.

Leo and Raph were quiet for a few moments, taking in everything Raph had said but then a small smile crept on Leo's face. It was still mixed with hurt and the same regret that had been in his eyes for months after Mikey's death but he couldn't deny the smile hearing how Mikey had reached out for Raph, like he'd always do.

"He trusts you Raph, you always had a strong bond" Leo smiled. "Even if you don't want to admit it, you two have always been close" He added, seeing at Raph was ready to protest. But even Raph knew it was true. They were so different, and yet they loved each other.

Of course the four brothers all loved each other equally, and they would all die for each other, but there would always be sort off 'preferences' no one favored one brother, but it had always been Leo and Donnie to be together, and somehow Raph and Mikey shared a really strong bond, despite being so different.

Mikey always viewed his older brother as a protector, and always came to him to feel safe. And right now it wasn't any different. He was seeking safety after all he had been through. Mikey had always felt safe in Raph's hold, it wasn't natural but the grip had always been strong and protective, and that's what he loved about him, and needed right now.

"He's still scared Leo….." Raph said, glancing back at Mikey. They all knew he had a long way to go before he could start to recover. But he was starting to accept them, seeking for help and that was saying he was starting to get better slowly.

"I know Raph… and I fear he'll always be. He has been there for a whole year, who knows what they did to him" Leo sighed, finishing up the sandwich he was preparing for Mikey. He gritted his teeth slightly, it was true, he had been there for a year, all alone. And if April hadn't found him, he would still be there.

"We have to make them pay Leo, everyone who did this to him" Raph hissed quietly, bailing his fists in anger. He didn't care what Leo would say about his decision, it didn't matter if Leo approved or not, he would kill them, all of them. He just hoped he did, they had to do this as a family.

"I know Raph, but not now…." Leo whispered, trouble flashing over his eyes. "I have to ask Donnie first… but I think it would be better if … Mikey would see them again, eventually" Raph blinked at Leo's statement, he wanted to scream at his older brother, asking him if he had totally lost his mind.

Bringing Mikey back to the place he had practically been tortured for a whole year, crying his guts out for his brothers and being completely terrified once he got back, but Raph couldn't bring himself to open his mouth. He wanted to scream, but he couldn't.

And with every silent second he began to change his mind. It was crazy what Leo was suggesting, and it could completely break Mikey down, but it could also help him greatly. Seeing the people who did things to him, but the other way around.

He wouldn't be the one being tied down, begging them to spare his life, or the pain. No, this time he would be the one to decide their fate, he could finally see they couldn't hurt him anymore. Raph slowly nodded, they could talk about this later, he was just glad Leo agreed with his plan.

They would make them pay, all of them. And despite everything father had taught them, not of those scientists were making it home again that night, Raph would make sure they wouldn't, ever again. In fact, none of them would leave the building alive.


	11. Chapter 11

When Leo and Raph returned to the kitchen again, together with a simple sandwich, they were greeted by this cute yet heart-breaking sight, and smiles crept on their faces. Donnie had placed his chair next to Mikey's chair and his forehead was resting on Mikey's forehead, both had their eyes closed.

Something they would always do when they were younger. Always when one of them was feeling nervous, or was feeling down the other one would press his forehead against the other and just sit still for minutes, sometimes even half an hour, until the other one had calmed down again.

And that was exactly what they were doing right now, their foreheads pressed against each other and Donnie holding Mikey's hands tightly, occasionally squeezing them slightly to assure or comfort him, and it warmed both Leo and Raph to see their little brothers interact like that, and Mikey finally reaching out for them.

"Hey Mikey, I bet you're hungry" Leo softly said, not trying to startle his younger brother but apparently that didn't work as Mikey immediately shot up, looking over to Leo with big and terrified eyes, his mouth twisting to let out another hiss, but containing himself when he saw it was his older brother.

Leo stood still for a few moments, looking into Mikey's eyes as they changed from completely terrified to a softer gaze, lowering his head in shame. His fists clenched slightly and a few tears brimmed in his eyes, which Leo immediately wiped away and gave a small smile to his younger brother. Mikey nodded slightly and sniffled.

Leo nudged Mikey's shoulder slightly before Mikey turned towards the food, his stomach turning painfully as he saw the food in front of him, and all of his brothers noticed his discomfort about seeing the food. Raph slowly stepped forwards, kneeling next to Mikey and looking over to him, while Mikey continued to stare down.

"What's wrong little bro?" He whispered softly, resting a soft hand on his shoulder and squeezing it slightly. Immediately Mikey's head shot to the right, thinking someone was attacking him again but relaxed afterwards, seeing it was only his older brother, gazing down to the food, and again they could all see the shame on Mikey's face, almost attacking his own brother.

"I-I can't….. they w-would…." Mikey whispered, his voice breaking on top of the raw tone it had, tears appearing in his eyes as he slowly reached out for the bandages around his arm, the one to hold all his needle marks, red and irritated. He wasn't touching it but his fingers were ghosting over the area, tears from both the pain and fear.

Mikey was struggling to find the right words, still not confident with speaking to his brothers but he was trying as hard as he could, and yet he couldn't seem to open his mouth to tell them. He couldn't make himself to say another word to his brothers. Donnie rested a hand on his other shoulder, giving him a small smile.

"It's okay Mikey, I think I get it." Donnie cut in and took a deep breath "They gave you food though those needles didn't they?" He asked in a low voice. Tears were now falling down as Mikey shakily reached for the side of his face, where still some red and angry markings were from the chains to hold his muzzle in place.

He had been muzzled for so long, never taking it off, not even to feed him. They fed him through needles, and when Mikey slowly and hesitantly nodded, Donnie knew he was right. Somehow he was happy Mikey was trusting them enough to confess, but he was also feeling angry, furious even because of the confession.

Those people dared to muzzle his only little brother for a full year, at least he assumed he was. And that's why his voice was now raspy and extremely painful to use for him. No water had passed his throat for such a long time, and no food had been digested by his stomach. And it sickened Donnie, on top of being experimented on alone, he was unable to eat for a year.

"Don't worry, you can still eat normally Mikey, you just have to be careful for a while. I'll make you some fruit and ask April to get something more okay? We'll have to build up your food again slowly" And before Mikey could even agree, Donnie was gone already, leaving the three brothers alone in the kitchen.

Mikey was still crying, tears leaking down his face and opening his mouth continuously. He wanted to say something, he really did but nothing came out of his mouth. His throat burning from those few words he had spoken already but he wanted to say more, anything. Raph seemed to notice his distress and carefully drew him closer.

"Don't overdo yerself little bro, ya don't have to force anything" Raph whispered, seeing how much Mikey was struggling, opening and closing his mouth to say something. Mikey sniffled and nodded slightly in Raph's hold, closing his mouth again. It wasn't like he didn't want to talk to them, he just couldn't get himself to speak.

Eventually Donnie came back with some cut fruit, like Splinter would always give them when they were just toddlers, not trusting them with big pieces of fruit, and put it in front of Mikey, who hesitantly ate it. When Leo saw Mikey was eating the food in front of him, he grabbed Donnie's arm and dragged him outside.

He felt bad for leaving Raph alone, and leaving him out of the conversation but Mikey needed someone with him right now, especially when he was finally reaching out for them, and he felt safe around Raph, they couldn't deny that. He could tell Raph everything later on, if something important was discussed.

Donnie didn't seem to understand Leo's reason to drag him outside the kitchen but followed without complaining, knowing that it had to be important. Eventually Leo dropped himself on the couch and burrowed his face in his hands. He was shaking slightly and taking deep breaths, trying to contain himself.

"What does this mean Donnie, what will happen to Mikey?" His voice sounded desperate, vulnerable. Something they rarely heard from their leader in the past 16 years. He was always so confident, he always knew what to do and was always a rock for them, most of the times. Donnie could hardly remember a time when he'd heard that voice, so desperate and hopeless.

When they were younger Leo had always taken the role of leader, even though nobody made him leader. But he had always burdened himself with the task of looking after his family. He would always contain his tears, or fears for the sake of his little brothers. There was this time when Raph was terribly wounded in the sewers.

He had run into the sewers after Raph had disobeyed Master Splinter by going into the sewers alone. Leo had found Raph, wounded. His leg was badly broken and that was one of the first times Donnie had heard his oldest brother beg, pleading to his father. Asking is Raph would be okay, trembling with fear and not knowing what to do.

But as they grew older and older, Donnie never heard that voice again, only on rare occasions, and Mikey's death being one of them. He could still remember how loud Leo had cried that night. The blanket loosely thrown on the ground, he was curled up with his pillow crushed between him, crying and sobbing.

Donnie had, despite his own grief, come to his older brother and hugged him. He had never expected Leo to hug him back, thinking he'd push away, but he didn't. Leo had wrapped his arms around Donnie's waist, squeezing and crying in his hold, tears staining Donnie's plastron and not thinking about letting him go anytime soon.

He had begged Mikey to come back, pleaded for someone to give their baby brother back, that it wasn't fair; He was supposed to be dead, not his little brother, and on top of that he had been so desperate, his voice so helpless as he asked Donnie that one question that would haunt them forever, 'how would they continue without Mikey?'

And Leo was right. How could they continue without their fourth member, their fourth brother and friend. How could they ever live their lives again without the glue of the family, the one to make them smile every day no matter what happened. And how could they live with the gap that was left in their hearts when Mikey died. They had no idea, but somehow they managed.

The desperate voice was something Donnie never heard from that day on. Leo had cried his heart out that day in Donnie's hold, but only that day and after that he went back to his leader role, reversing the roles and calming his brothers down when someone brought up Mikey, or after having a nightmare, but right now that voice was back, hurt and desperate.

"He'll be okay Leo… it's just that…." Donnie stopped for a second and sat down next to his older brother, wrapping his arms around Leo and drawing him closer. "He was fed through the same way as a gastric feeding tube, when people are in coma or something and can't eat" Donnie explained, watching Leo closely as he absorbed the information.

Leo took a deep breath in his hold, nodding slightly indicating he understood but not saying anything. Donnie could feel Leo was trying to hold himself together, but was obviously failing to do so. It was all too much for him, for all of them, seeing Mikey broken like this. But Donnie pushed past the thoughts and opened his mouth again.

"He hasn't been eating orally, but he will be able to do so again in time" Donnie explained in simple terms so Leo could follow. "We just need to be careful and slowly build up his digestive system, lots and lots of fibers. So fruits and vegetables will be perfect" Leo nodded again slightly, taking in all the information.

"Don't be sad Leo, he'll be fine. I promise" Donnie whispered and wiping away the thick tears falling from Leo's eyes as soon as he noticed them. His eyes were starting to become red already, filling themselves with tears again the moment Donnie had wiped them clean, and he couldn't stop them, for once he couldn't.

"Don't say that Donnie, you saw him too… he's terrified, he'll never be the same again" Leo said, keeping his voice low so Donnie wouldn't notice the quiver he was carrying around, but Donnie noticed nevertheless. He hated feeling so weak, he was supposed to protect his family, be their leader, not cry in front of them.

"I know Leo, but we'll get through this mess. We always did" Donnie whispered and pulled Leo's head close to his plastron. It wasn't often Donnie did this, but he knew Leo was at his end, mentally and emotionally. And he was too. His brother was dead for a year, and now he had come back to them.

Scarred and petrified, and hearing what has happened to him the past year made their blood boil. They didn't even know what they did to him, not all of it, but they knew some things. And only those terrified them already. They didn't even know what they did to him apart from that, they didn't know the mental damage they had done to him.

"I can't stand seeing him like this Donnie, he's just so…" Leo said but stopping mid-sentence, he didn't even know what he wanted to say. He couldn't possibly explain how Mikey was feeling, or how he was looking. Almost every emotion was mixed with his face. Doubt, fear, hurt, anger and those were only a few, not to mention the scars.

They could see the sparkle of hope and happiness in his eyes like they remembered, being back home with his brothers once again, but that was surpassed by the intense fear, the nightmares and horrifying memories he got when he was in that lab, tested on for a full year. All alone for all those months with those people.

"Me neither Leo, but he's still Mikey. And that's all that matters right now, he's finally back with us" Donnie said and closed his eyes slightly but found himself unable to open them again. He began to hum slightly and rocked Leo back and forth, and soon he heard the familiar snore of his older brother. A small smile crept on Donnie's face.

It had been so long since they had done this, Leo rarely allowed someone to comfort him like this, and he rarely fell asleep using one of his brothers as a pillow. When they were younger they all did regularly, but when they grew older Leo never fell asleep like that, Mikey still did often, and Donnie too. But Raph and Leo didn't.

Donnie sighed and leaned back on the couch, placing Leo a bit clumsily on top of his plastron. Leo whimpered slightly and shifted as he was trying to find a comfortable position but eventually stopped. And it wasn't long after that that Donnie felt himself drifting too, falling asleep on the couch.

TMNT

Only thirty minutes later Casey and April came back from the store, two full bags of groceries with them. Filled with food, other things they needed and at Donnie's request lots of foods and vegetables for Mikey, though both of the humans had no idea why they had to buy it, but none of them had complained about it.

Casey dropped the heavy bag with a sigh and was ready to call for someone when April jabbed him in the ribs and pointed at the couch, giggling slightly. Casey followed her finger when he saw it too. Leo was lying partly on top of Donnie, fast asleep and snoring slightly, both relieved yet tired expressions on their faces.

On the other couch were Mikey and Raph. Mikey on the side and his knees drawn to his chest. Raph's left arm, which was originally around Mikey's shoulder, had now fallen behind Mikey's shell and his head softly on top of Mikey's left shoulder, his eyes closed and softly snoring too, just like Leo and Donnie.

Mikey's eyes were still open and glassily looking over to the TV, which was practically muted so it wouldn't wake up his brothers, but still softly playing sounds and showing some cartoon that aired just months after Mikey's disappearance. April smiled slightly and picked up a loose blanket and carefully walked up to Mikey.

"Are you comfortable?" April whispered towards Mikey, kneeling in front of him so she wouldn't startle him and being silent for the sleeping guys. Mikey slowly looked up to her, almost studying her and glanced to Casey who was now laying a blanket on top of Leo and Donnie, before turning back to April.

"Yea" He cracked, drawing attention from both April and Casey who both look surprised but happy. A smile spread on April's face and Mikey returned it for a second. April glanced over to Raph, who was happily asleep against Mikey's shoulder. Carefully she wrapped the blanket around both of them and stood up again.

"Tell me when you need anything" She softly called out and turned around, walking over to Casey. She nudged Casey's arm and signed towards the kitchen, bringing the bags along with them and leaving the brothers alone.

* * *

><p><strong>Mikey is slowly trusting the guys again, let's see how long it lasts :3 <strong>


	12. Chapter 12

"I get it dad, you can't come…" Leo whispered, nervously glancing back to the living room where his baby brother was seated, he needed his father right now but it just wasn't safe. The foot had picked the worst possible moment to scout the city. And Leo was called just seconds ago by Splinter that he had spotted the group all over the surface.

They were even in the sewers, forcing him to stay in the lair so he wouldn't be spotted accidently, and eventually giving away the location of their lair. But that also meant Splinter couldn't leave the lair to go to April's house, and be there for his youngest son, but they couldn't return to the lair either. And with April's aunt coming home tomorrow, that would be a problem.

"Michelangelo doesn't need me specifically" Splinter cut in, his voice gentle but still stern. "I can't risk our lair being discovered, you must be there for him while I am gone, you and your brothers." Leo's hand sighed and tightened his grip on the phone in his hand. He didn't like this, he didn't like this at all.

Mikey needed his father right now, the plan was to get some old drawings of Mikey to remember him, or to ease him slightly. But they never thought about their enemies that were still looking for their lair, and Leo was just grateful they hadn't seen his father when he entered the sewers and discovered the lair.

"Dad… he needs you right know. I need you… I don't know what to do anymore. He's talking again but he refuses to talk about what happened, or say something without us asking him first.." Leo said, biting his lip slightly. Tears were again threatening to form in his eyes but he wouldn't cry again. He was the oldest, he needed to be strong.

But as soon as the first tears appeared he knew he wasn't strong enough. He sank back in to the chair in the kitchen, hanging his head low but still keeping the phone against his ear so he could hear his father. He honestly had no idea how they could help Mikey, his little brother was so scared and traumatized.

"Some wounds can't be treated right away my son, some wounds are too big for us to handle at first. You have to make sure you keep it clean, and do the best you can to mend it until you know how to treat it" Splinter said lowly, and even Leo could hear the sadness in his voice. And just like all of them, he was worrying for Mikey too.

"I understand" Leo cracked, taking a deep breath to calm himself down, and prevent himself from breaking down completely. "Just call me as soon as they are gone, we can't stay at April's house another day, and we can't go anywhere else, okay?" And it was true. April had told them they could stay as long as they wanted.

It was no problem to provide them with all the things they wanted, food, water, shelter and a warm house. But her aunt was still coming back the next day, and they had to move in the dark otherwise they would get spotted, so they had to move tonight, but with the foot patrolling the sewers, they had no chance.

They could fight of course, but Mikey was in no state to fight anyone. He was still scared, and meeting the foot and forcing to fight them, would do no good. It could even ruin everything they had achieved in the last 2 days after they had rescued him from the lab. And they still had to deal with those guys.

"I will my son" Splinter assured his oldest son. "I have faith in you all, Michelangelo's wounds are deep but they can be healed with time. Don't push him Leonardo, I love you all" And with that the line went dead, leaving Leo alone with the silence. Leo angrily dropped the phone onto the table in front of him and buried his face in his hands.

He wasn't angry with his sensei, his father. He wasn't angry with his brothers or friends. No, he was angry with himself. His father trusted him, his brothers relied on him and yet he wasn't strong enough, he wasn't strong enough to be the leader he was supposed to be, he couldn't help Mikey, not a year ago, and not now.

Leo took a deep breath and looked up slightly, outside the window. It was still light outside, almost 2 pm, it was long until they had to make a decision and Leo wasn't looking forward to that. There was simply no option other than leaving the house and risking being spotted by the foot, or staying at April's home and meeting her aunt.

And neither of those options sounded like a good idea, Leo just hoped the foot would be gone before they had to go otherwise they would really be in trouble. Mikey couldn't fight, and they couldn't go through the trouble of moving Mikey to an unknown location, he wouldn't be able to handle that.

Leo could hear his brothers and friends talking softly, keeping it low so they wouldn't startle Mikey, and occasionally Leo could hear his baby brother speaking. His voice was still raspy and obviously painful for him to use, but the more he talked, which wasn't that much, and the more he drank… it wasn't as it used to be, but it was slowly getting better.

"How'd it go?" Leo's eyes snapped open when the sudden voice interrupted him. His eyes flew to the red haired teen, who was walking over to the refrigerator. Leo took a few deep breaths, he never heard April approaching him, some ninja he was. He forced himself to relax again and looked down again in shame.

"Not good, the foot is still in the sewers, Sensei can't get out, and we can't get to the lair without any of us being spotted." Leo explained with a heavy voice, not wanting to let his own desperation to show too much, but obviously April caught his distress and walked over to him, wrapping her small arms around him.

And somehow the hug actually made him feel better. The hug was tight but April hadn't trained for a very long time, not like they had, so Leo barely felt any pressure around his own muscular arms, but it relaxed him in a way. April smiled and squeezed to assure him slightly, and yet he couldn't seem to relax.

"It'll be alright Leo, the foot will be gone tonight, you'll see" She whispered in his ear, squeezing a little bit more. It felt weird having April's tiny arms around him. They could hardly reconnect again because of his muscles but it felt weird. He was supposed to be the one comforting her, not the other way around.

"And even if they are gone, we will put Mikey through all this pressure, he isn't ready to go out yet" Leo protested, squirming slightly to get out of the hug, but April wouldn't let go. Eventually he let out a long sigh and relaxed slightly in her hold, dropping his head on April's arm a bit awkwardly, but April didn't seem to mind.

"I know Leo" April sighed, and only then she released him again, walking over to the refrigerator to get some fruit, presumably for Mikey, and set it down on the countertop next to the refrigerator. "But it has to be done, you know that. You are always welcome, but if you don't want my aunt to know…" She explained with a heavy voice.

"I get it April, I really appreciate it, but I rather want to keep me and my brothers a secret… but if the foot is really in the sewers, I'm afraid we'll have to stay here. We can't move Mikey to an unknown location, it would only frighten him more" Leo said with a sigh. He honestly didn't want to be seen by April's aunt.

But if they had to choose between April's aunt, or the lair being discovered by the foot, and eventually the Shredder. He would go with the first one, besides everything April had told him about her aunt, it still wouldn't do anything good to them, and her aunt. April quickly finished cutting the fruit and pushed them onto a plate.

"We'll just have to wait Leo" April said softly as she picked up the plate with the fruits and walked outside the kitchen but turned around before doing do. "Mikey's asking for you, I know that probably don't want to see him because you think you failed him or something stupid like that, but he needs you right now" And with a small smile she left the room.

That was the thing Leo loved the most about April, she was straight to the point, mostly. She wasn't dancing around the subject but was telling what was happening, like with Mikey. And yet she did it in such a way it made Leo feel better, and he couldn't prevent the smile that slowly appeared on his face and he slowly stood up.

TMNT

Mikey mumbled slightly in his sleep, whimpering and curling into a ball. Sweat was trickling down his forehead and he was weakly flailing with his limbs. Donnie was watching, feeling his heart painfully against his chest. They had made so much progress the last 2 days, but still Mikey was far from the way he used to be.

The scars being one thing to remind him, but the nightmares were probably the worst. Reliving everything that had happened to him, sometimes they were worse and sometimes they weren't, but they would always wake him up screaming. Crying and begging for someone, even when he didn't specifically said so.

They all knew he was longing for a hug, something to ease him, to give him the feeling of safety. And that was the thing that hurt Donnie the most. He was getting better with trusting them, talking to them, but the nightmares didn't improve a single bit, and he would always wake up screaming just as hard as the first time he came here.

"Shouldn't we like, wake him up or something?" Casey muttered, helplessly watching as Mikey continued to moan and thrash weakly. He was sitting on the edge of the couch with a frown on his face. He felt bad for the little guy. He didn't hear a lot about the freckled turtle, but he knew he was the happy one, laughing and pranking his brothers.

And this was far from the small description April had given him in the last year. He was scared by everything that had happened, by everything they didn't know about. Even if he improved greatly already, he still wasn't ready to talk about anything he had gone through. But they knew they did horrible things to him.

Another quiet moan escaped Mikey's lips and a few tears were beginning to seep through his eyes, mixing with the few drops of sweat trickling down his side. His eyes were squeezed shut and his knees were drawn to his plastron, but not quite touching it, his arms tightly wrapped in between his legs and plastron and his head resting on top of his hands.

"He needs his rest Casey" Donnie whispered, not wanting to wake up Mikey. "Besides, you know what happened the last time we did" Casey winced slightly at the memory, sure he hadn't seen Mikey attacking his own brother, but he had seen Raph passed out on the floor and the glass shards all over the floor, and some even cutting in his shell.

And even Casey couldn't ignore the huge bags under the eyes of the freckled turtle. He was exhausted and it was clear he hadn't been sleeping correctly in who knows how long. He needed his sleep for now. But it still pained them all to see Mikey struggling like this, obviously suffering from a bad nightmare. Casey nodded slightly and looked outside the window, sighing slightly.

"What is taking Leo so long?" April suddenly cut through the silence, gesturing to the closed door behind her. They could all hear the muffled sound of Leo talking on the phone, but nobody could actually hear what he was saying. He had already been on the phone for half an hour, and the rest was starting to wonder what he was doing.

"He's talking to dad" Donnie explained in a quiet voice. "The foot is still in the sewer so we can't bring Mikey back to the sewer, but honestly it would be better if we did." Donnie sighed and ran his hand carefully along Mikey's forehead with a soft towel, wiping away some sweat lingering on his skin.

Casey was watching him carefully, occasionally glancing back to the moaning turtle and then back up. They were both sitting on the edge of the couch, Donnie at one side, where Mikey's head was, and Casey on the other side. Donnie slowly looked up, meeting Casey's eyes, auburn eyes meeting Casey's brown ones.

Soft snores were coming from their left side and they all quickly glanced to the source of the noise. Raph was resting on a pillow with a blanket on top of him, just like Mikey. Casey and April had found him this morning, sleeping along with Leo and Donnie, and Mikey supporting Raph but the little turtle didn't seem to notice it at the same time.

They had woken up a few hours later for some lunch, and Leo went to call his father for his absence. Leo and Donnie weren't that exhausted but Raph had barely slept the whole night, and the previous one so he passed out on the couch after lunch, and that was 5 hours ago already, and Raph still hadn't woken up.

"You know you don't really have to leave right?" April whispered after a few seconds. Her eyes were filled with worry and hurt. They last 2 days had been hard, for all of them and it was only getting worse. They had to move Mikey back home, but the foot was probably still in the sewers and looking around, and her aunt was coming back tomorrow.

She loved her aunt, she really did but at the same time she loved to be alone for once. Her aunt was really sweet, almost too sweet. She would always ask her about everything, and every time something had happened, she would get concerned, way too much. But the problem was that she would definitely freak out by seeing 4 giant turtles.

And hiding them in her room wouldn't be an option either. Mikey's screams would eventually alert her, because no matter what they did, they couldn't prevent Mikey from having them. And her aunt would surely come into her room during the day, so they would get discovered no matter what.

Donnie was about to open his mouth when the blue banded turtle walked in. Small tears were in the corners of his eyes but he had no emotion written over his face. His t-phone was tucked in his belt and he looked around the room with a pained expression, his eyes eventually catching the sleeping form of Mikey.

Despite Mikey being his long lost little brother, Leo still couldn't face his little brother without tearing up again. He couldn't stand seeing all the wounds on Mikey's body. And the nightmares he had because he had failed to protect his little bro a year ago. And every time, no matter how hard he tried, he always ended up crying again.

He was supposed to be the older brother, the strong one, and to be a rock for his family. Only that faithful night he had broken in front of Donnie, but after that he had accomplished to remain strong. Hiding the aching of his own heart, and hiding the desperate cries at night for the sake of his family, he had to be the leader, not the other way around.

"What did dad say?" Donnie cut in, noticing the tears in Leo's eyes as he continued to stare at Mikey. The moans had died out slightly but Mikey would eventually whimper and he was still curled into a tiny ball, his blankets tightly folded around him. Leo tore his gaze from the freckled turtle and sat down in a chair.

His eyes trailed from Mikey to Raph, and again he felt his heart clench painfully. He wasn't thrashing or struggling from a nightmare but it was obvious Raph had exhausted himself these last days, dark bags were under his eyes, just like Mikey's. Though Mikey was worse. And Leo couldn't help but to blame himself again.

Of course there was no way he could've seen it with Raph wearing his mask all the time, and the only reason he was seeing it now because he had removed the mask when he discovered Raph had passed out on the couch, and brought him a blanket to get him comfortable. But he still had to notice the tiredness with Raph.

Casey and April were holding up well, but even Leo could see that the discovery of Mikey was taking a toll on them too. It was Sunday right now and none of the two had any plans on going to school tomorrow. Casey would mostly skip school to hang out with the guys, and April had assured them she would be there as much as possible now Mikey was back.

And with her dad being kidnapped, the teachers would let her go for a few days without questioning, if she would still make her homework and it wouldn't mess up her grades. She had only done it one time before. The day Donnie had made retro-mutagen for her father, but it was all spilled in the fight.

Donnie had promised her he would make new retro-mutagen for her father, but it would take a long time before he had more, and once they found Mikey, he hadn't continued, and April understood that. They had to focus on Mikey first, and how much she wanted her father back, she knew she couldn't ask Donnie to make retro-mutagen, not now.

Leo took a deep sigh and looked up, April, Casey and Donnie were all watching him closely, waiting patiently for him to say anything. Raph shifted slightly next to him and Leo glanced at him for a few seconds before returning his gaze to the rest again and taking a deep breath, his eyes narrowing slightly.

"The foot is gone, we are going home tonight"

**So the foot is gone, and they are taking Mikey home tonight, what can possibly go wrong? :3 **

**Also, this Saturday I'll be going to Austria with my school to go skiing :D But I won't be posting until Sunday afterwards because of that, and the house doesn't even have wifi so I can't respond to anything :( **

**But I'll be buying a ticket with a low amount of internet, so I'll be able to read the reviews (Hint hint ^^), but responding will cost too much of that internet and it'll be gone before I even get there… :/**

**See ya in a week and a half! **


	13. Chapter 13

**Ugh! This one took me so long. Teachers throw you right back into school after the break. 2 presentations, 2 tests etc. etc. And this chapter just didn't want to be written =.=**

It was completely silent around April's house, nobody dared to say anything and they were all preparing to leave soon. The sun was already gone and it was completely dark outside expect for the few lights illuminating the sky. Any other day it would be a beautiful sight to watch. And they would surely stop to enjoy it, but not tonight.

Everyone felt the pressure around the house. Nobody knew what was going to happen, the foot was gone but it was still dangerous to transport Mikey anywhere. He hasn't been outside for a year, apart from the little trip to April's house. He was still extremely weak and his legs would give out within seconds of walking.

His muscles convulsing because of the sudden exercise. Donnie had assured them he would be okay if they would slowly build up his muscles again, but it would take a lot of time before he would be running around again. He only managed short runs to April's room, and even those were mainly fueled by fear and adrenaline.

Raph was the strongest out of them so he would be carrying his baby brother home tonight. April and Casey would go with them and still they were extremely vulnerable. If they would get caught, both Mikey and Raph would already be unable to fight, for the first part at least. And someone had to stay with Mikey to defend him.

April hasn't been training for a really long time, and while she was already pretty good, she certainly couldn't hold her ground against all those trained ninjas. Casey was good but impulsive and was fighting with strength rather than real ninja moves. He still held up pretty good, but the lack of training got him hurt a lot. And still they had no other choice than to go.

TMNT

"You know you can't ignore him forever Leo" Donnie whispered as walked into the kitchen. Leo whipped his head around, catching Donnie's auburn eyes for a few seconds before gazing down on the fruit beneath him. His mouth was firmly sealed as he continued to cut the pieces of fruit beneath him, forcing his tears to stay back.

"Leo…" Donnie breathed out, taking another hesitant step. "Don't shut me out too, I only want to help you… and Mikey" A low growl escaped Leo's throat but never turned around to face his younger brother and continued to make food for Mikey. They would leave soon, and Mikey would need some food in his system before they'd leave.

Donnie sighed and walked over to Leo. The eldest' shoulders were tense and his mouth formed a thin line on his face. His eyes were focused on the fruit beneath him and yet he wasn't looking at all, lost in his thoughts. Carefully Donnie wrapped his arms around the older turtle and nuzzled his beak in Leo's neck.

Leo growled again. A sound Donnie had heard way too often in his life. It was the sound of their leader and it was at moments like this they all knew they shouldn't argue with their oldest brother. And not even Raph dared to argue with Leo when he growled like this. He rarely used it, but way too often for Donnie's liking.

It meant something was really wrong, a fight that went wrong, Leo threatening their enemies to stay away, or giving an import and maybe life-saving order to his brothers. And Donnie couldn't help but to flinch every time he heard the growl, Leo only did it to keep his brothers safe mostly and still it was scary, but not this time.

"Just give him this" Leo snapped, untangling himself from the hug and shoving the food in Donnie's hand, but the genius brother wasn't about to let Leo go this easily and angrily put the food away and stopped Leo before he could leave the kitchen, snatching his wrist and turning him around. It wasn't often he was like this.

"Don't gimme that Leo" Donnie hissed, unusual anger present in his voice. Donnie was furious and an obvious shiver went down Leo's spine. "He asks for you and you keep ignoring him, why won't you see him? He's your brother." Donnie continued, a bit less threatening but still furious about Leo's behavior the last couple of days.

"I just… can't" Leo snapped, his voice cracking with the last word and his shoulders slumping. For a second he allowed his emotions to get the better of him but he immediately wiped the tears away with the back of his hand, attempting to walk past Donnie again, but again the taller turtle wouldn't allow it.

"Bullshit Leo, I did, April did, Raph did. Heck even Casey visited him!" Donnie said, raising his voice slightly. He was angry, no furious with his older brother and yet he couldn't help but to feel sorry for Leo. He was truly heartbroken, they all were and yet Leo seemed to take everything the hardest, and they all knew why.

"Just leave me alone" Leo hissed and angrily pushed Donnie out of the way, making him stumble slightly. Leo only accomplished to take a few more steps, attempting to get out of the kitchen before a pair of surprisingly strong arms wrapped around him and turning him around, forcing his head against Donnie's crook in his neck

Donnie said nothing as he steadied himself, not daring to let Leo go despite his futile attempts to get loose. Donnie could feel Leo's attempts weakening and slowly his arms began to shake. And it wasn't before his neck was staining with tears, he noticed what was going on with his eldest brother, and he tightened his hold slightly.

"I-I c-can't … D-Donnie…. " Leo hiccupped completely breaking down in Donnie's arms. "He'll hate me Donnie… he hates me…" He whispered, his voice cracking with every word. Donnie just held his older brother close. They all knew Mikey's disappearance was the hardest on him, it was his fault, though no one blamed him.

"He won't Leo, I'm sure" Donnie whispered and pulled out of the hug, carefully wiping away the few lost tears in the blue eyes. "Go to him Leo, he's asking for you" And with a small smile Donnie handed Leo the plate of food. Leaving Leo no choice to deny it, but Leo gratefully accepted it, though he was still hesitant.

"He won't hate you Leo, he missed you. All of us but you rarely visit him" Donnie looked down for a second, his own tears threatening to come. "He keeps asking me, small words but he's asking for you… he wants you too Leo, he needs you" Donnie mumbled and hugging his own body tightly. Leo slowly nodded, the plate trembling slightly in his hold. He slowly stepped forwards and wrapped a single arm around Donnie's body, pulling him close for a moment.

"Thanks little bro" Leo mumbled back and pulling out of the hug again. "Just relax for now, everything's set. We'll leave after I get Mikey, 'Kay?" Donnie slowly nodded, they were all up tight for this evening. Leo told them the foot was gone, but honestly Leo could be lying for that matter, or the foot could still be around New York. They just didn't know.

And that's probably what scared them all the most, not knowing what was going to happen. They couldn't make a plan because they didn't know what was coming. Mikey couldn't handle the stress, couldn't handle to fight, and they would be severely weakened if they were attacked, someone had to stay to defend Mikey. They just hoped they wouldn't encounter any enemies.

TMNT

Softly he knocked on the wooden door. The plate of food still balancing on one hand, and the other at the door. Mikey had claimed April's bedroom ever since the incident with Raph, and nobody complained about it, not even April herself. She was happy to give her room to Mikey if that would make him feel more comfortable.

"Mikey?" Leo softly called out, giving his youngest brother a warning before softly opening the door. The room was dark, only the light coming from the window lightening the room. Mikey was sitting on the bed, his knees drawn up to his knees and his eyes fixed in his arm, the bandage undone and the huge surgical wound in full view.

Leo flinched slightly seeing the wound and all the stitches but shook his head slightly. Mikey tensed slightly when Leo stepped into the room but never looked up, trailing his fingers along the large wound and all the stitches. A violent shiver went down his spine and he gasped slightly, and Leo quickly put the plate aside.

"Do you.. hate me?" Mikey's voice was low, and even after a whole day still raspy and painful. Donnie had assured his voice would be back to normal eventually but it would take time. He hadn't talked in the last year, hasn't said a single word at all. His throat was extremely dry and the muscles or something had to be build up again.

Leo could feel his heart tighten even with those few words. Mikey thought he hated him, but he could never ever hate his baby brother. And honestly, Mikey was supposed to hate him after everything Mikey had been through because of him. And yet Mikey was asking him if he hated his little bro, the one that had been gone all this time.

"Never Mikey" Leo cracked, almost rushing over to his youngest brother. Mikey tensed visibly when the mattress beneath him sank because of Leo's weight but didn't pull away or made a move at all. His eyes kept fixed on the huge surgical wound on his arm, and at the same time he wasn't even looking at it.

"Why?" Again the raspy voice Leo grew to hate. He was happy, so damn happy Mikey was speaking to them, acknowledging them and being comfortable enough to speak up, but at the same time he hated it. He hated hearing how painful and raspy the voice was, and how much it hurt Mikey to speak even those small words.

And even though it was just a simple word, Leo knew exactly what his little brother meant. Why he was ignoring him. Mikey still wasn't looking up, and it horrified Leo to see the wound up close. His skin was clean again but the wounds hadn't disappeared. He still wore the bandages around his wrists and ankles, and around his legs and arms.

"Because" Leo started hesitantly, shifting slightly. And still Mikey made no motion to move at all, or look at Leo. "Do you… remember that night.. a year ago?" Leo carefully asked. He needed to know if Mikey still remembered the reason. The one and only reason he was captured in the first place.

Mikey tensed and his arms slowly started to shake slightly, barely noticeable but Leo caught the spasm movement. His eyes were squeezed shut and his breathing got heavier with the second, desperately trying to calm himself down. Agonizing seconds past but eventually Mikey managed to control himself enough and nodded slightly.

He remember, everything about that night. So many nights he had replayed it in his head. There was no way he could ever forget that night, ever again.

"I can't look at you without thinking about that night… how can you still have me around Mikey? Y-you should h-hate me…." Leo continued, his voice cracking as tears once again appeared in the corners of his eyes. The same horrible feeling crashing over him, the same the first night they knew, or thought, Mikey was dead.

The same night he cried himself to sleep in Donnie's arms, pleading and begging for someone, anyone to give their baby brother back. He had remained strong after that but he still carried the memories of that faithful night. The words that were spoken around the lair and the emotions written on Mikey's face, the last thing he'd ever see of him.

He was brought out of his thoughts when something warm touched his plastron. His eyes snapped open, unaware that he had even closed them, and looked down. A small smile made its way on Leo's face as he saw Mikey's head pressed against his plastron. It wasn't a full hug, and Mikey obviously wasn't comfortable enough for something like that.

But Mikey was trying to show his affection. Carefully Leo wrapped his arms around Mikey's small body. It was small, his growth had been tempered with because of the poor living conditions, and the lack of sunlight and movement in the past year, but his arms still fit perfectly around his little brother, bringing him closer slightly.

"Never" Mikey whispered softly, keeping his eyes open but nuzzling his face in Leo's plastron. They stayed there for a few minutes, both shedding tears. Leo could feel his plastron staining with them but he didn't protest, the same ones rolling down his cheeks. So many nights he had bared the weight laying on his shoulder.

He never told anyone about it, not more than he had to. His brothers had assured him it wasn't his fault but he could see it in their eyes, in Raph's eyes. And every day he was forced to watch how his family was slowly tearing apart, how Raph was tearing himself apart over the loss of his baby brother, his best friend and the one he had sworn to protect.

"Thanks.." Leo muttered, not really knowing what to say before carefully pulling out of the hug. "We should get going soon, are you ready to go?" He whispered as he carefully snatched Mikey's wrist, presenting the stitches, earning a shudder from both turtles. Mikey gulped and looked away quickly but allowed Leo to keep his arm.

Out of the corners Leo saw Mikey nodding, still hesitant but it meant he was ready to go. There was still a slight tremble in his body and it was obvious Mikey was beyond scared to go outside. And just like Leo, he didn't want to leave April's home, where it was safe. But it would be better to go home, and even Mikey knew.

"Nothing will happen to you Mikey. Raph will carry you the whole way" Leo tried as he carefully re-wrapped the wound again, covering it with the bandages and making a mental note to replace them once they got back home again. This time Mikey slowly twisted his head, looking into Leo's sea blue eyes.

"I'm serious Mikey, no one will hurt you ever again, not as long as I'm living." He stated with a confident voice. "They'll regret if they do" He said, and he was deadly serious. He had always been serious about protecting his little brothers and the small family they had, but right now he was more serious than ever. Anyone who would even try to hurt his baby brother would pay, dearly.

He watched Mikey closely as he finished the bandages around his arm, covering the wounds once again and letting out a slight sigh. Mikey was beaming at him with his giant baby blue eyes. The same eyes that once held such joy and innocence, but was completely shattered right now, only few pieces remaining. And on top of the fear and suppressed joy, there was determination.

"I'm ready"


End file.
